compassion for pedophiles? - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 11-13-2011, 09:41 AM
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http://www.uua.org/safe/handbook/reand/165937.shtml

http://techland.time.com/2011/11/04/...ed-pedophiles/

I have compassion for them and think a lot of the over-the-top hatred of them is a way of distancing oneself from them. It almost seems like gay-bashing, at times, to me.

The topic has recently touched my life in 2 separate instances. One was an online 'friend' who was arrested and appears to be guilty, but the other was a 10 year old boy I know IRL, who was tormented at school by facualty and peers because another boy who didn't like him accused him of saying something sexual about boys the 10 year old had invited to a sleepover that weekend.

I'm 99% sure the comment was never made, mostly because I know and love the 10 year old, but also because his accuser said he'd used the word "penises" and this 10 year old always says "dick". Reminded me a little of the Salem Witch Hunts. The kid is definitely scared for life.

Someone told me that they recently read about some test, where they had a little girl act lost and ask for help at a public mall and no one would help her for a very long time because they didn't want to be accused of anything. People can't hug kids or be alone with them anymore. It's getting ridiculous.

Thoughts?
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#2 Old 11-13-2011, 09:50 AM
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Pedophiles are the scum of the scum. I do feel bad for peeps falsely accused but for the actual pedophiles, none what so ever.
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#3 Old 11-13-2011, 09:56 AM
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Pedophiles are of no concern, rapists and sexually abusive persons are.

"Hell exists not to punish sinners, but to ensure that nobody sins in the first place."
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#4 Old 11-13-2011, 09:56 AM
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What a brave and unpopular opinion, Forster.
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#5 Old 11-13-2011, 09:59 AM
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After having worked with them for years, it's a tough spot. They're human, but they made a decision that caused damage to others. And from speaking to quite a few, it WAS a decision they made. They full well knew what they were doing, and they chose that path. So, they get what they deserve. And if anything ever happened to my own kids, the laws of my area would make no difference.

You can apologize or be an apologist for these abnormal beings all you want, but many knowingly do what they do and there's no excuse for that. From what i've seen on this site (amazingly), there seems to be some kind of making the pedophile the victim. You dig your own grave, you lie in it.

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#6 Old 11-13-2011, 10:02 AM
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Originally Posted by delicioso View Post

What a brave and unpopular opinion, Forster.

Sorry but I've got no compassion for someone who would do that to a child. None, not ever.
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#7 Old 11-13-2011, 10:08 AM
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I have to agree that there are something a little worrisome about it all. Maybe it's because I was molested when I was a child, but I feel it's important to understand why they do what they do and make attempts to prevent pedophiles from ever engaging in the harmful behavior they are compulsed towards. While I was lucky enough to dodge the figurative pedo-bullet, it seems that a lot of the perpetrators were once victims who'd become warped by the abuse they experienced themselves. I know I'll always be different after what I experienced, even if it isn't in the same way. Pedophiles and child molesters typically aren't people who were just born evil monsters, or someone that wakes up one morning and thinks it's a good idea to engage in sexual activity with a child. At the very least, society should try harder find a way to make sure today's victims don't become tomorrows monsters, even though it is immensely unpleasant to think about.

Of course, while I say that, I feel that when a pedophile actually goes through with their impulses and becomes a child molester, it is too late for them, and they need to be removed from society like any other dangerous criminal. When they cross that line, it shows that they are far more interested in their own gratification than the havoc they wreak on the lives an a developing person. I don't believe it's a good idea to let a murderer or a rapist go free after some counseling, and it isn't a good idea to consider doing the same for a child molester.

So, compassion for pedophiles? Sure. Compassion for child molesters? None whatsoever.

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#8 Old 11-13-2011, 10:10 AM
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So, compassion for pedophiles, sure. Compassion for child molesters, none whatsoever.

+1

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#9 Old 11-13-2011, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by delicioso View Post

http://www.uua.org/safe/handbook/reand/165937.shtml

http://techland.time.com/2011/11/04/...ed-pedophiles/

I have compassion for them and think a lot of the over-the-top hatred of them is a way of distancing oneself from them. It almost seems like gay-bashing, at times, to me.

The topic has recently touched my life in 2 separate instances. One was an online 'friend' who was arrested and appears to be guilty, but the other was a 10 year old boy I know IRL, who was tormented at school by facualty and peers because another boy who didn't like him accused him of saying something sexual about boys the 10 year old had invited to a sleepover that weekend.

I'm 99% sure the comment was never made, mostly because I know and love the 10 year old, but also because his accuser said he'd used the word "penises" and this 10 year old always says "dick". Reminded me a little of the Salem Witch Hunts. The kid is definitely scared for life.

Someone told me that they recently read about some test, where they had a little girl act lost and ask for help at a public mall and no one would help her for a very long time because they didn't want to be accused of anything. People can't hug kids or be alone with them anymore. It's getting ridiculous.

Thoughts?

It sounds like you're rationalizing your "compassion" based partially on a case where someone was wrongly accused? Should we also embrace murderers because of Sacco and Vanzetti?
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#10 Old 11-13-2011, 10:27 AM
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Originally Posted by Snowcone View Post

I have to agree that there are something a little worrisome about it all. Maybe it's because I was molested when I was a child, but I feel it's important to understand why they do what they do and make attempts to prevent pedophiles from ever engaging in the harmful behavior they are compulsed towards. While I was lucky enough to dodge the figurative pedo-bullet, it seems that a lot of the perpetrators were once victims who'd become warped by the abuse they experienced themselves. I know I'll always be different after what I experienced, even if it isn't in the same way. Pedophiles and child molesters typically aren't people who were just born evil monsters, or someone that wakes up one morning and thinks it's a good idea to engage in sexual activity with a child. At the very least, society should try harder find a way to make sure today's victims don't become tomorrows monsters, even though it is immensely unpleasant to think about.

Of course, while I say that, I feel that when a pedophile actually goes through with their impulses and becomes a child molester, it is too late for them, and they need to be removed from society like any other dangerous criminal. When they cross that line, it shows that they are far more interested in their own gratification than the havoc they wreak on the lives an a developing person. I don't believe it's a good idea to let a murderer or a rapist go free after some counseling, and it isn't a good idea to consider doing the same for a child molester.

So, compassion for pedophiles? Sure. Compassion for child molesters? None whatsoever.


+1 All of this.
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#11 Old 11-13-2011, 10:36 AM
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Originally Posted by unovegan View Post

After having worked with them for years, it's a tough spot. They're human, but they made a decision that caused damage to others. And from speaking to quite a few, it WAS a decision they made. They full well knew what they were doing, and they chose that path. So, they get what they deserve. And if anything ever happened to my own kids, the laws of my area would make no difference.

You can apologize or be an apologist for these abnormal beings all you want, but many knowingly do what they do and there's no excuse for that. From what i've seen on this site (amazingly), there seems to be some kind of making the pedophile the victim. You dig your own grave, you lie in it.


Spooky this thread starting as CG and I were just discussing Pedophilia this morning! As neither of us have been impacted by it or met anyone else who has been we therefore have no knowledge of motive / background of such individuals.

It is such an emotive issue especially amongst parents that it is uncomfortable and taboo subject for discussion most of the time isnt it?

In what capacity do you work with Pedophiles unovegan?
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#12 Old 11-13-2011, 10:41 AM
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Spooky this thread starting as CG and I were just discussing Pedophilia this morning! As neither of us have been impacted by it or met anyone else who has been we therefore have no knowledge of motive / background of such individuals.

It is such an emotive issue especially amongst parents that it is uncomfortable and taboo subject for discussion most of the time isnt it?

In what capacity do you work with Pedophiles unovegan?

i was a correctional officer for years and worked in sex offender pods. I also case managed parolees and sex offenders were a big part of it.

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#13 Old 11-13-2011, 11:00 AM
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People can't hug kids or be alone with them anymore. It's getting ridiculous.

Thoughts?

Snipped by me.

Children need to be protected. It is a little baffling to me as well as a selfish way of looking at it to think it "ridiculous" because you can't hug them. Look at the bigger picture and how many children are taken advantage of and abused by people they know/trust. You may not have known you interacted with someone who was molested but I would be willing to bet the odds are pretty good. I don't exactly talk about my molestation with all the people I know. In fact, very few people in my real life even know about it.

Children are being taught to ask if they may pet dogs and how they should pet the dog when given permission, why shouldn't an adult feel it appropriate to get an okay from a parent before engaging in physical contact in order to protect the child and themself?
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#14 Old 11-13-2011, 11:30 AM
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I mostly agree with Snowcone although there does seem to be some evidence that many child molesters haven't been sexually molested as children as previously was believed.

I'm sure there are people that have sexual urges towards children but know they wouldn't harm a child and do reach out to their doctors and ask for help and hopefully they should get treatment from their local mental health team.

Child molesters are different in my opinion and should be removed from society so children can be protected. I think the sentencing in the UK is unfair as I know people that have been imprisoned for burglary for more prison time than someone who has sexually attacked a child. I think the short sentences for rapists are a joke as well honestly. Sexual crimes often do cause a lot of psychological damage to the victim and I think the sentencing should reflect that.
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#15 Old 11-13-2011, 12:25 PM
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Originally Posted by AspireToInspire View Post

Snipped by me.

Children need to be protected. It is a little baffling to me as well as a selfish way of looking at it to think it "ridiculous" because you can't hug them. Look at the bigger picture and how many children are taken advantage of and abused by people they know/trust. You may not have known you interacted with someone who was molested but I would be willing to bet the odds are pretty good. I don't exactly talk about my molestation with all the people I know. In fact, very few people in my real life even know about it.

Children are being taught to ask if they may pet dogs and how they should pet the dog when given permission, why shouldn't an adult feel it appropriate to get an okay from a parent before engaging in physical contact in order to protect the child and themself?

interesting point.

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#16 Old 11-13-2011, 12:32 PM
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Compassion, to me, implies a desire for knowledge, which is an act of intelligence. Reacting to criminality out of fear is not intelligent, nor useful, beyond a short-term, short-sighted fix. When society reacts to criminality out of hatred or revenge, it commits an act of collective criminality, in my view. At the very least, fear, hatred and revenge should not be allowed in our penal activities.

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#17 Old 11-13-2011, 03:57 PM
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Why are child molesters generally seen as worse than murderers, other rapists and people who torture animals? Victims who are killed also lack the possibility of getting their life back -- obviously, because they don't have one.

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#18 Old 11-13-2011, 03:58 PM
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Why are child molesters generally seen as worse than murderers, other rapists and people who torture animals?

Because:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph...ilHasStandards

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#19 Old 11-13-2011, 04:15 PM
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So, compassion for pedophiles? Sure. Compassion for child molesters? None whatsoever.

The big problem with that is that most pedophiles create a market for child porn even if they're not acting out in real life.

It is our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities. ~A. Dumbledore
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#20 Old 11-13-2011, 04:22 PM
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The big problem with that is that most pedophiles create a market for child porn even if they're not acting out in real life.

I think that many download it, so a demand won't be created per se.

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#21 Old 11-13-2011, 04:32 PM
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Even if it's free, a market for it is created just by interest - meaning more will be made.

It is our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities. ~A. Dumbledore
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#22 Old 11-13-2011, 04:34 PM
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Even if it's free, a market for it is created just by interest - meaning more will be made.

Things will rather be recirculated than made - and often enough, I think that material will be made for "self-use"

Why would things be made for free?

Unless pedophiles are humanists. *lol*

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#23 Old 11-13-2011, 04:51 PM
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An audience is a market. Even if something is offered for free, those who make the product will be encouraged to make more if it gets good ratings. When the internet first started there was a relatively small amount of porn online. But that quickly exploded because there was huge interest and there were ways to make money even if the site didn't charge. Child porn is the same. As long as there are pedophiles seeking kiddie porn, there will be people willing to provide it.

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#24 Old 11-13-2011, 05:12 PM
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When the internet first started there was a relatively small amount of porn online.

- beg to differ, but your main point I agree with.
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#25 Old 11-13-2011, 05:23 PM
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- beg to differ, but your main point I agree with.


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#26 Old 11-13-2011, 06:09 PM
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Pedophiles are of no concern, rapists and sexually abusive persons are.

Just curious as to how you arrive at that conclusion?
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#27 Old 11-13-2011, 06:12 PM
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Just curious as to how you arrive at that conclusion?

Because the first one doesn't always mean the other one.

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#28 Old 11-13-2011, 06:16 PM
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Things will rather be recirculated than made - and often enough, I think that material will be made for "self-use"

Why would things be made for free?

Unless pedophiles are humanists. *lol*

Are you serious? Do you honestly think that because there is lots of that kind of filth and degradation available that those guys won't make more? And when looking at the pictures doesn't give him the same thrill any more, do you think he won't escalate? And do you think that when that guy makes it 'for his own use', that a child isn't being abused? Excuse me, what planet do you live on?
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#29 Old 11-13-2011, 06:24 PM
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Are you serious? Do you honestly think that because there is lots of that kind of filth and degradation available that those guys won't make more? And when looking at the pictures doesn't give him the same thrill any more, do you think he won't escalate? And do you think that when that guy makes it 'for his own use', that a child isn't being abused? Excuse me, what planet do you live on?



You are misinterpreting my point.

Read Poppys first post.

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#30 Old 11-13-2011, 06:24 PM
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An audience is a market. ....... Child porn is the same. As long as there are pedophiles seeking kiddie porn, there will be people willing to provide it.

Wholeheartedly agree Poppy and just to remind all the sympathetic people here, that there are two people involved in the lifestyle in question and one is an adult and the other is a little child. It also seems naive to assume that pedophiles are different than molesters. Molesting is the verb, what they do because they are pedophiles. And assuming that a grown man (usually) is going to restrain his sexual impulses because his target is a child is akin to accepting that factory farmers love their animals (like we love the animals). Good grief, even priests who are supposed to be teaching people about a loving and vengeful God, have been known to rape a child or two. If they couldn't control their own impulses (ethics, morality, fear of GOD), then what makes it seem reasonable that pedophiles deserve sympathy but molesters don't?
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