Should I report this? (possible child abuse?) - VeggieBoards
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 Old 06-28-2008, 09:33 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Hey all. I am debating over something. Tonight when I was going to my car after work, I observed a woman treating a child... unkindly, at best. The child (a girl, perhaps 3 year old) was pitching a fit, sitting on the ground next to the car. The woman, possibly/probably her mother, was shouting at the child, and snatched her up by her arm, swinging her into the back seat of the car. The child had been sitting near the back of the car, so the one-armed trip was a good 4 feet or so, and the child swung some, and shouted 'ouch ouch ouch!' Getting into my truck (across the parking lot) I could hear her spanking/beating/hitting the child, and her cussing and shouting at the girl. I was able to get their lisence number, but I am not sure what I should do now. I'm in the southern 'country' part of the US, so the spanking alone probably wouldn't be cause enough, but swinging the child by the arm like that... I'm not so sure.



So... should I call the police, or stay out of it, or what? The child was certainly being a brat, but the lady could have dislocated her shoulder...
GhostUser is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 Old 06-28-2008, 09:35 PM
Veggie Regular
 
nwysca's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 250
It's always better to be safe than sorry. I would report it!
nwysca is offline  
#3 Old 06-28-2008, 10:11 PM
Veggie Regular
 
sallyomally's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 4,483
I agree. Call.
sallyomally is offline  
#4 Old 06-28-2008, 10:22 PM
Eek
Veggie Regular
 
Eek's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: BC
Posts: 203
I say call too
Eek is offline  
#5 Old 06-28-2008, 10:35 PM
Veggie Regular
 
Masja's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 808
Legally if you suspect child abuse, you have to report it...who knows maybe there is more to this going on at home that you don't know about, you should report it.
Masja is offline  
#6 Old 06-28-2008, 11:02 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Ok, maybe a stupid question, but who exactly should I call? The police office? The non-emergency number, I suppose, but should I wait until morning (it's one AM now)? Sorry for all the questions but I've never reported something like this before...



Just for the record, the reason I am somewhat hesitant is that my family was once the victim of a false call of child abuse, and it was a mess, even though there was NO abuse whatsoever, and no evidence, either (I was one of the children- I would know!). Just a child (my sis) who didn't like momma's new boyfriend. I would hate for anyone (innocent) to go through what we went through, but I keep thinking of how she swung that child. :/



I think I will call in the morning. I would have called tonight, but between my inital hesitancy and having a medical emergency with one of my rats, it got pushed to the back burner.
GhostUser is offline  
#7 Old 06-28-2008, 11:19 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
You seen her swing the child, and thats not nothing. I would call, but I've never done this either and can't answer your other questions.
GhostUser is offline  
#8 Old 06-28-2008, 11:30 PM
Veggie Regular
 
sybaritik's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,063
Don't call the police. Only call them if it's an emergency.



Call the number here that corresponds to your state here.



Or, call the hotline number 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) and they will take the details and advise you on whether to call the police or not.



Even if you only have a suspicion that abuse is happening you can call that number and your complaint will be noted.
sybaritik is offline  
#9 Old 06-29-2008, 08:32 AM
Veggie Regular
 
rainforests1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,204
Obviously you're the one person on here who knows whether it was abuse. If you felt it was child abuse, I would definitely have it reported.
rainforests1 is offline  
#10 Old 06-29-2008, 08:38 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Fyvel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 5,664
I would report it. If she treats her child like this in public, with onlookers, imagine how she treats her at home
Fyvel is offline  
#11 Old 06-29-2008, 09:56 PM
Veggie Regular
 
chryssiie718's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 2,769
Quote:
Originally Posted by sybaritik View Post

Don't call the police. Only call them if it's an emergency.



Call the number here that corresponds to your state here.



Or, call the hotline number 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) and they will take the details and advise you on whether to call the police or not.



Even if you only have a suspicion that abuse is happening you can call that number and your complaint will be noted.



I agree with this. There should also be a local number for the Dept. of Children and Families or Child Welfare or whatever they call it where you are. You can report anonymously, I think.

"Women & cats will do as they please, & men & dogs should relax & get used to the idea." Robert Heinlein
chryssiie718 is offline  
#12 Old 06-29-2008, 10:27 PM
Super Moderator
 
danakscully64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 34,591
I agree with everyone, report it. It's true, if she's willing to treat her kid like this in public, you can imagine what she does in the privacy of her home.
danakscully64 is offline  
#13 Old 06-30-2008, 08:24 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Cissy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 11,759
what everyone else said
Cissy is offline  
#14 Old 06-30-2008, 09:10 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Earthly Delight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,503
report it.



I work with children and we're always always always told--report it. They won't take the child away cus some stranger said so--they'll look into it, so you don't have to worry about breaking up a good family. You would however get that girl to safety, if she needs it...
Earthly Delight is offline  
#15 Old 06-30-2008, 10:37 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Byzantea's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 732
If a little voice speaks up and says, "Hey! That's not right." It shouldn't be such a little voice.
Byzantea is offline  
#16 Old 06-30-2008, 10:40 AM
Newbie
 
xsummerx's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 22
report it
xsummerx is offline  
#17 Old 06-30-2008, 11:27 AM
Veggie Regular
 
zoebird's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 8,451
typically, if i feel that there's something amiss, i'll call and then let child protective services sort it all out.



honestly, if there isn't a problem, they'll close the case. if there is a problem, they'll find a solution.



so, i call.
zoebird is offline  
#18 Old 07-01-2008, 06:43 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Tablaqueen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 560
I would also say call. We've had a few really horrible cases here in the UK where children were killed by their guardians and it seemed that the neighbours wondered but never did anything about it. Better to be safe than sorry!
Tablaqueen is offline  
#19 Old 07-01-2008, 06:56 AM
Veggie Regular
 
cstadt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,992
What's the point in calling if whoever she calls won't be able to find the woman?

I agree in calling, yes, but they aren't going to have anyone to go after. Maybe she frequents that store? You might see her again. I know I see tons of regulars are my grocery store, especially because I generally go at the same time interval each each or emergency trips during the day
cstadt is offline  
#20 Old 07-01-2008, 07:01 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Kill Uncle's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 3,419
Quote:
Originally Posted by cstadt View Post

What's the point in calling if whoever she calls won't be able to find the woman?

I agree in calling, yes, but they aren't going to have anyone to go after. Maybe she frequents that store? You might see her again. I know I see tons of regulars are my grocery store, especially because I generally go at the same time interval each each or emergency trips during the day



She wrote in the post that she got the womans license plate number.
Kill Uncle is offline  
#21 Old 07-01-2008, 07:31 AM
Veggie Regular
 
cstadt's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,992
eh, I read wasn't. I checked, you're right. Thanks! Then I am another supporter of the calling. It might be intimidating but it will be worth it.
cstadt is offline  
#22 Old 07-01-2008, 10:47 PM
Newbie
 
Dunne147's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by zoebird View Post

typically, if i feel that there's something amiss, i'll call and then let child protective services sort it all out.



honestly, if there isn't a problem, they'll close the case. if there is a problem, they'll find a solution.



so, i call.



I agree with this. Just call, because it might actually be more serious than what you saw.
Dunne147 is offline  
#23 Old 07-02-2008, 11:31 AM
Veggie Regular
 
JLRodgers's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,819
While all the others said to call it'd be better.... sadly it would be.



I say sadly as I've seen what these child protective services people do. Sometimes good, many times they do things that make things worse. I know one kid who was taken from his family because of a call before they investigated anything. Found out nothing bad was happening. Returned the child. Family couldn't live it down as everyone found out -- but few found out that they were innocent. Sometimes they go by a "guilty until proven innocent" philosophy -- and as it is, even the best parent would be considered unfit on some days if you get a service worker in a bad mood.



It's that latter thing I'd give people some leeway -- your situation is in the fence leaning towards the bad.
JLRodgers is offline  
#24 Old 07-03-2008, 12:14 PM
Veggie Regular
 
lavande's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 331
That was really smart of you to get the license number...If I saw something like that, I probably would have been too shocked and wouldn't have the presence of mind to even do that! Report it, and hopefully they will look into it. Too many children are abused in this country for us to ever let it go if we think there's a problem.
lavande is offline  
#25 Old 07-03-2008, 12:20 PM
Beginner
 
kiz_paws's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 104
I would definitely call the non-emergency police telephone number on the grounds of the woman using the child's arm as a flinging device. Scary. Very scary. The spanking part of it, well, I was not there, and I can't say whether or not a spanking is abuse in this case (though it surely sounds like it).



But yeah, her flaying the child into a car by one arm is not how a child should be treated, so CALL! The worst that can happen is that the call is made, looked into and put to rest. The best that can happen is that the woman is now noted by the authorities and had darn well better get her act in order if she wants to keep her child.
kiz_paws is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the VeggieBoards forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in


Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off