This is NUTS![husband doesn't like feeding son veg food] - VeggieBoards
Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 Old 05-03-2008, 10:33 AM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
OMG....My omni husband thinks that just because i give my son veggie foods that im tryin to make him vegetarian. whenever im in the kitchen makin something to eat like a veggie burger or sandwich, an my son comes in, he's like mommy that looks yummy, can i have some? what am i gonna do, refuse because it has no meat? i give some food to my son and he likes it...he's four by the way. so the thing is, my son tells his dad that he ate veggie food and that it tastes good. at times thats what he prefers. when he has meat with his dinner ill give him the veggies first so ill have no issues getting him to eat them...my husband get mad that when he's eaten his veggies he doesnt want his meat anymore...i'm like how is that my fault, and he says that if i would have never given him the veggie foods then he wouldnt want them....i cant help it if they taste good, and you know how picky kids are....why not give him something that i know he'll eat thats GOOD for him? sorry for ramblin. but we had an argument over this earlier this earlier, an i jus needed to vent.
GhostUser is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 Old 05-03-2008, 10:41 AM
Veggie Regular
 
wutaweirdo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 845
Well, your husband might think you're a bit biased if you said "Well, veggies are HEALTHY and meat is not so much"... but I grew up hearing people say "Now, eat all of your vegetables so you grow up big and strong", NOTHING about making sure you finished your dead animal bits. I mean... it's not like you can go to the doctor and say "Help! My son LIKES to eat his vegetables!!!"



Sorry I can't be of more help, but I'm happy to hear your son enjoys food some kids get picky about.
wutaweirdo is offline  
#3 Old 05-03-2008, 10:45 AM
Newbie
 
Shadiza's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 33
Good for you! I'm sure it's hard to make sure your son has healthy, tasty food to eat while your husband tries to push meat for him. I admire your fortitude in the face of such resistance.
Shadiza is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#4 Old 05-03-2008, 11:00 AM
Veggie Regular
 
bigdufstuff's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 2,472
Your husband sounds like he is irrational about your childs eating. You are doing nothing wrong. In fact you're doing something good! Maybe you two should have a talk about your son's eating habits and make sure to tell your husband why eating veggies is a good thing!
bigdufstuff is offline  
#5 Old 05-03-2008, 11:09 AM
Beginner
 
Shortpotato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 143
Quote:
Originally Posted by wutaweirdo View Post

Well, your husband might think you're a bit biased if you said "Well, veggies are HEALTHY and meat is not so much"... but I grew up hearing people say "Now, eat all of your vegetables so you grow up big and strong", NOTHING about making sure you finished your dead animal bits. I mean... it's not like you can go to the doctor and say "Help! My son LIKES to eat his vegetables!!!"



Sorry I can't be of more help, but I'm happy to hear your son enjoys food some kids get picky about.





I second that! We all know veggies are good for us. And your husband should know that too. My husband is leary about feeding our son a vegetarian diet, even tho just like the above quote, eat your veggies and you will be big and strong. Good luck to you, and again, its geat your son eats veggies! They ARE good for him! :-)
Shortpotato is offline  
#6 Old 05-03-2008, 11:34 AM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigdufstuff View Post

Your husband sounds like he is irrational about your childs eating. You are doing nothing wrong. In fact you're doing something good! Maybe you two should have a talk about your son's eating habits and make sure to tell your husband why eating veggies is a good thing!





my husband knows that eating veggies is good. its jus that he get concerned that if my son doesnt eat his meat then hes not gonna get all the protien that he needs...then we get into it because im tellin him that its possible to get adequate protein eating veggies...now he wants to rethink the way i feed my son..
GhostUser is offline  
#7 Old 05-03-2008, 01:57 PM
Veggie Regular
 
guinnesshero's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,510
I have never heard of a parent complainig that their kid eats their veggies
guinnesshero is offline  
#8 Old 05-03-2008, 04:33 PM
Veggie Regular
 
froggythefrog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 9,260
This sounds like the underlying issue is really whose values your son is going to take on and your husband might feel like his values are being left out. You might want to see if that's what's bugging your husband.
froggythefrog is offline  
#9 Old 05-03-2008, 05:23 PM
Bof
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 3,965
At four years old a child is well able to understand all the reasons for eating a veg*n diet. I know that mine were.
Bof is offline  
#10 Old 05-03-2008, 06:50 PM
Beginner
 
snowbunny11's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 137
Well, perhaps if your husband allowed you to buy tofu, beans and other processed soy products this would not be an issue. I remember that thread from 2 months ago where you wrote and asked us what to do because your husband wouldn't allow you to buy *veg* food. I am really STILL not crazy about your husband. At least his irrationality and need to control here is extended over his son. someone he should have control over, unlike last time where it was only extended to you. Please reread all the concerned responses to that that thread and see that your husband maybe is not the greatest guy.
snowbunny11 is offline  
#11 Old 05-03-2008, 08:29 PM
Veggie Regular
 
lovingthegreen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 625
Quote:
Originally Posted by caliveg View Post

and he says that if i would have never given him the veggie foods then he wouldnt want them



Huh?



If he had never given him meat products, he wouldn't want those too. Very weird train of thought there. He obviously is completely against the child eating veggie foods for some reason.



Well, everybody's had great advice - I will just say that I wish you the best because I know you are not in the best situation given your values.
lovingthegreen is offline  
#12 Old 05-03-2008, 08:51 PM
Veggie Regular
 
KellyBon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 462
It sounds like you aren't in the best situation. I'm sorry it can't be fun being in a relationship that's not

based on respect. I hope he atleast doesn't argue about this in front of your son.
KellyBon is offline  
#13 Old 05-03-2008, 09:00 PM
Veggie Regular
 
Irizary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,743
Quote:
Originally Posted by snowbunny11 View Post

Well, perhaps if your husband allowed you to buy tofu, beans and other processed soy products this would not be an issue. I remember that thread from 2 months ago where you wrote and asked us what to do because your husband wouldn't allow you to buy *veg* food. I am really STILL not crazy about your husband. At least his irrationality and need to control here is extended over his son. someone he should have control over, unlike last time where it was only extended to you. Please reread all the concerned responses to that that thread and see that your husband maybe is not the greatest guy.



If this is true, I'd be looking for a way out of that marriage or a way to earn my own money. If nothing else, do it for your son to lessen the chances that he grows into a) a controlling jerk or b) a wimp who can't stand up for himself.

"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

Every animal you eat
was running for her life

Irizary is offline  
#14 Old 05-03-2008, 10:54 PM
Veggie Regular
 
LucidAnne's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,709
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bof View Post

At four years old a child is well able to understand all the reasons for eating a veg*n diet. I know that mine were.



unfortunately, many grown adults dont understand all the reasons!
LucidAnne is offline  
#15 Old 05-03-2008, 11:04 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Quote:
Originally Posted by LucidAnne View Post

unfortunately, many grown adults dont understand all the reasons!



Yeah.. and I've known 4 year olds who could barely speak (for reals)! I think Bof's kids are just pure genius.
GhostUser is offline  
#16 Old 05-04-2008, 08:34 AM
Super Moderator
 
danakscully64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 34,591
Please keep up what you're doing. I think because I was the last child of 4 in my family, I got away with a lot more than my siblings (in terms of my diet, just my diet, not other stuff). A lot of my meals came from the ice cream truck and I seriously ate more sugar than anything else. I wish that I had learned better eating habits growing up, but back in the 80's, it wasn't like it is today (ads on tv about vegetables and stuff). I didn't start eating healthy until I was 18 and became a vegetarian.



Have you considered sitting your hubby down with a nutritionist? How about just printing info off a credible website?
danakscully64 is offline  
#17 Old 05-04-2008, 09:05 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Fritemare's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,154
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenrunner View Post

Yeah.. and I've known 4 year olds who could barely speak (for reals)! I think Bof's kids are just pure genius.



When I first went vegan, I was actually schooled by a 5 year old. I was eating skittles, and offered her some. (She was born and raised vegan) She pretty much told me to learn to read labels because they CLEARLY had gelatin which was made from animals and refined sugar. She also walked around trying to get other children to not eat meat. I bet her parents were proud of her.



As for your husband not wanting your son to eat veggies, it sounds like there is something else going on there. I can't imagine a dad saying "No vegetables for you, stuff your face with meat!" My husband used to be pretty much a carnivore until we got married. Now, he gets angrier than I do if someone feeds Ares meat bits. He says he doesn't want people poisoning his son with toxic meat. (My husband is an omni, he only eats vegan at home.)
Fritemare is offline  
#18 Old 05-04-2008, 09:21 AM
Super Moderator
 
danakscully64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 34,591
Your husband sounds awesome, Fritemare! My bf was an omni when we met, now a vegetarian, and he gets even more upset when he eats a non-vegetarian product than I do when I eat something bad. He also gets more upset than I do when I eat something bad. (Accidently only, we never intentionally eat non-veg products)



Who knows, maybe the hubby in this situation will see the light. He's actually lucky that his wife isn't forcing the vegetarian concept down his throat and preventing their son from eating meat. (from an omnis perspective, I mean)
danakscully64 is offline  
#19 Old 05-04-2008, 10:53 AM
Veggie Regular
 
MRSSHF's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 820
Caliveg, It's not only important that you continue to offer your child vegetables and other veggie foods for the sake of his future health, but it is also important that your husband get on board with you, because as your son ages, he is far more likely to take his food queues from his dad than from you. Whether your son ends up as a veg or an omni, it's critical that he maintains a healthy, well balanced diet consisting of mostly plant-based foods. This will greatly reduce his risk of developing obesity, heart disease and even cancer. Approach this from a health standpoint with your husband, and he may stop being such a jerk about it.



I have bad genes in my family. We have a strong history of both heart disease and cancer, and my father even developed type 2 diabetes in his early 50s, and he died from brain cancer before his 60th birthday. No male on my father's side of the family has lived to be 70 in at least 6 generations. My husband was totally freaked out at the prospect that he would not be able to "share the experience" of a pro baseball game, camping, and many other events if he couldn't give our son the traditional unhealthy meaty foods like hot dogs and burgers and all that other crap. When I explained that I was not interested in outliving my son and that I wanted to give my child the opportunity to live a full and healthy life, the light clicked on, and he has been 100% on board with raising the baby veg ever since.



I know this is already too long, but based on previous thread, I want to add really fast that I believe that your husband has some serious control issues, and I continue to be concerned for your welfare in the long run. I wish he would agree to counseling, and I hope you will find a way to go without him if he won't go. When your child grows up, he will model the way your husband treats you, and if you don't want your son to trap his spouse and deny her basic choices, then you really need to get some help.
MRSSHF is offline  
#20 Old 05-04-2008, 11:02 AM
Veggie Regular
 
Nishani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 7,577
Quote:
Originally Posted by caliveg View Post

sorry for ramblin. but we had an argument over this earlier this earlier, an i jus needed to vent.



I don't blame you for arguing, your husband always sounds very difficult to live with regarding the diet issues.

m8itcanw8.com
Nishani is offline  
#21 Old 05-04-2008, 11:38 AM
Super Moderator
 
danakscully64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 34,591
^^^



And MRSSHF, excellent advice!
danakscully64 is offline  
#22 Old 05-04-2008, 12:39 PM
Veggie Regular
 
zoebird's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 8,451
i would go ahead and give him a book about healthy child diets.



honestly, when my husband and i were reviewing the Dr Sears baby book, the feeding section was vegan for the most part. i mean, honestly--most everything on the list is vegan (there are veg and omni foods too).



so of course, we have no problem with the idea of our child eating "veggie foods" which are predominately what omnis eat anyway (my husband is an omni, but honestly, about 70% of his diet is 'vegetarian' foods).



i would tell him to stop being ignorant.
zoebird is offline  
#23 Old 05-04-2008, 12:43 PM
Veggie Regular
 
Dirty Martini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 8,777
Quote:
Originally Posted by caliveg View Post

my husband knows that eating veggies is good. its jus that he get concerned that if my son doesnt eat his meat then hes not gonna get all the protien that he needs...then we get into it because im tellin him that its possible to get adequate protein eating veggies...now he wants to rethink the way i feed my son..



If this is what you're telling your husband, it's no wonder he doesn't believe you. A 4-year-old will not get adequate fat or protein just from "eating veggies". Hopefully you meant that you can get adequate protein on a vegetarian diet.
Dirty Martini is offline  
#24 Old 05-04-2008, 02:09 PM
Beginner
 
Sallie-Veggie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 171
This is nothing against you AT ALL, but your post makes me glad that I'm a single Mom!!
Sallie-Veggie is offline  
#25 Old 05-04-2008, 09:35 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dirty Martini View Post

If this is what you're telling your husband, it's no wonder he doesn't believe you. A 4-year-old will not get adequate fat or protein just from "eating veggies". Hopefully you meant that you can get adequate protein on a vegetarian diet.



that is what i meant...on a veggie diet. its really the veggie foods that my husband has issues with, like veggie burgers an veggie meats an things like that.

im not sure why he has issues with that, its not like they dont have good protien.
GhostUser is offline  
#26 Old 05-04-2008, 09:37 PM
Veggie Regular
 
Fyvel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 5,664
Quote:
Originally Posted by caliveg View Post

that is what i meant...on a veggie diet. its really the veggie foods that my husband has issues with, like veggie burgers an veggie meats an things like that.

im not sure why he has issues with that, its not like they dont have good protien.



Maybe your husband doesn't want you to feed your son vegetarian foods because they're not "manly" like meat (or at least how people perceive it). Some people have strange views about vegetarianism, and that soy is "feminizing" or might make males gay Perhaps you should discuss this with him to see where these concerns are coming from.
Fyvel is offline  
#27 Old 05-04-2008, 09:58 PM
Veggie Regular
 
LucidAnne's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,709
CV...maybe you should just outright ask him "why" he doesnt like your son to eat those foods? maybe it will plant a seed of insight in him as well.

we can speculate all we want, but we dont know your real family dynamics and can only go on what you say here. I have to say im concerned as well and i hope this can get worked out, its more than just a food issue.
LucidAnne is offline  
#28 Old 05-05-2008, 12:34 PM
Veggie Regular
 
TrailMix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 237
Quote:
Originally Posted by froggythefrog View Post

This sounds like the underlying issue is really whose values your son is going to take on and your husband might feel like his values are being left out. You might want to see if that's what's bugging your husband.



I agree with the above.



The underlying issue may be that your husband may feel threatened that you may be "turning" your son away from being like him. I'm not saying this is rational, but most emotional responses aren't. Your husband may just be feeling left out of the family if your son wants to eat like you.
TrailMix is offline  
#29 Old 05-05-2008, 02:04 PM
Newbie
 
GhostUser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 0
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrailMix View Post

I agree with the above.



The underlying issue may be that your husband may feel threatened that you may be "turning" your son away from being like him. I'm not saying this is rational, but most emotional responses aren't. Your husband may just be feeling left out of the family if your son wants to eat like you.



u are so right about that...he really does want our son to be like him...i have no problem with that at all...i jus dont want to feel like im being jumped on because of my influence on our son....im home with him most of the time so im all he sees...so why wouldnt he take from my example? im not goin outta my way tellin my son that he needs to be veg....he jus wants to do what he sees me do.
GhostUser is offline  
#30 Old 05-06-2008, 09:01 AM
Veggie Regular
 
LionSpirit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,181
Maybe you should just say this to your husband: "If he chosses to eat meat when he understands that it comes from those nice fluffly sheep and cute cows in the fields we saw the other day, then that's his choice and I'll respect it - but I'm not going to be as cruel, or let you be as cruel, as to force him to eat dead flesh for no good reason"
LionSpirit is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the VeggieBoards forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in


Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off