Stupid things omnivores say..... - Page 120 - VeggieBoards
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#3571 Old 05-08-2005, 12:05 AM
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*family was making some crustacean cocktails*

Sister - "Hey Lee, come out here for a minute. We need your help."

Me - "With dead animals?"

Dad - "Yes. Hurry up."



Sure, that seems logical...
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#3572 Old 05-08-2005, 10:42 AM
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Okay, so me, my friend, and my friend's friend who i never met before are at this japanese joint. I arrived first, so i had already ordered a bowl of edemame to snack on while I waited for them.



so, my friend and my friend's friend sit down at the table.



friend: watcha eating?

me: edemame

friend: whats that?

me: soy beans

friends friend: eww, your nasty! (nice meeting you too eh-hole)

friend: I didn't know vegetarians couldnt eat beans

me: what?

friend: didnt you say those were soy beans?

me: yeah

friend: if beans were vegetarian why would you have to eat soy beans instead of regular beans?

me: do you even know what soy is?

friend: its a meat substitute

me: no, actually its a bean plant from asia

friend: so they mash up the soy into little bean shaped things?

me: no, there is a plant called soy, they pick the pods off and they are little beans inside

friend: so why cant you eat regular beans then?

me: soy beans are regular beans, just a different kind



later on, i order some sushi

friends friend: I thought you were a vegetarian

me: i am

friends friend: then why are you eating sushi?

me: many kinds of sushi do not have fish in it.

friend: is it tofu sushi or somthing?

me: well, there some tofu in it

friends friend and friend: eww!

me: what are you ewwing about, between the two of you you hav eaten about 10 pounds worth of sushi in the past ten minuites, hell, the sushi you are eating now has tofu in it, lots of kinds of sushi has tofu in it.

friend's friend: I didn't know this was a vegetarian restraunt, i think im going to be sick

me: this is not a vegegarian restraunt, you just ordered some chicken dish about a minuite ago

friends friend: if its not a vegetarian restraunt than why did they put tofu in the sushi?

me: because thats how they make lots of sushi, they do it in japan like that too

friends friend: i didnt know the japanese were all vegetarians

me: there not

friends friend: then why do they eat tofu?

me: do you even know what tofu is?

friends friend: the stuff vegetarians eat



it only went downhill from that point, but it was amusing at least
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#3573 Old 05-08-2005, 03:53 PM
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^ that made me want to kill something. that is the absolute most annoying thing i've ever read. i hate people.
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#3574 Old 05-08-2005, 07:53 PM
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I think you need new friends, gguru1!
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#3575 Old 05-08-2005, 08:14 PM
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Originally Posted by porvida View Post

^ that made me want to kill something. that is the absolute most annoying thing i've ever read. i hate people.



Exactly!! Made me wanna hurt 'em and I don't even know 'em!
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#3576 Old 05-08-2005, 08:20 PM
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Are they just naturally stupid or were they just really trying hard to be pissy and annoying?

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#3577 Old 05-08-2005, 08:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gguru1 View Post

Okay, so me, my friend, and my friend's friend who i never met before are at this japanese joint. I arrived first, so i had already ordered a bowl of edemame to snack on while I waited for them.



so, my friend and my friend's friend sit down at the table.



friend: watcha eating?

me: edemame

friend: whats that?

me: soy beans

friends friend: eww, your nasty! (nice meeting you too eh-hole)

friend: I didn't know vegetarians couldnt eat beans

me: what?

friend: didnt you say those were soy beans?

me: yeah

friend: if beans were vegetarian why would you have to eat soy beans instead of regular beans?

me: do you even know what soy is?

friend: its a meat substitute

me: no, actually its a bean plant from asia

friend: so they mash up the soy into little bean shaped things?

me: no, there is a plant called soy, they pick the pods off and they are little beans inside

friend: so why cant you eat regular beans then?

me: soy beans are regular beans, just a different kind



later on, i order some sushi

friends friend: I thought you were a vegetarian

me: i am

friends friend: then why are you eating sushi?

me: many kinds of sushi do not have fish in it.

friend: is it tofu sushi or somthing?

me: well, there some tofu in it

friends friend and friend: eww!

me: what are you ewwing about, between the two of you you hav eaten about 10 pounds worth of sushi in the past ten minuites, hell, the sushi you are eating now has tofu in it, lots of kinds of sushi has tofu in it.

friend's friend: I didn't know this was a vegetarian restraunt, i think im going to be sick

me: this is not a vegegarian restraunt, you just ordered some chicken dish about a minuite ago

friends friend: if its not a vegetarian restraunt than why did they put tofu in the sushi?

me: because thats how they make lots of sushi, they do it in japan like that too

friends friend: i didnt know the japanese were all vegetarians

me: there not

friends friend: then why do they eat tofu?

me: do you even know what tofu is?

friends friend: the stuff vegetarians eat



it only went downhill from that point, but it was amusing at least

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#3578 Old 05-08-2005, 09:31 PM
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well, they are good people, they just arent that smart about some things, but they learned and they dont ask dumb things anymore
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#3579 Old 05-08-2005, 11:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gguru1 View Post

Okay, so me, my friend, and my friend's friend who i never met before are at this japanese joint. I arrived first, so i had already ordered a bowl of edemame to snack on while I waited for them.



so, my friend and my friend's friend sit down at the table.



friend: watcha eating?

me: edemame

friend: whats that?

me: soy beans

friends friend: eww, your nasty! (nice meeting you too eh-hole)

friend: I didn't know vegetarians couldnt eat beans

me: what?

friend: didnt you say those were soy beans?

me: yeah

friend: if beans were vegetarian why would you have to eat soy beans instead of regular beans?

me: do you even know what soy is?

friend: its a meat substitute

me: no, actually its a bean plant from asia

friend: so they mash up the soy into little bean shaped things?

me: no, there is a plant called soy, they pick the pods off and they are little beans inside

friend: so why cant you eat regular beans then?

me: soy beans are regular beans, just a different kind



later on, i order some sushi

friends friend: I thought you were a vegetarian

me: i am

friends friend: then why are you eating sushi?

me: many kinds of sushi do not have fish in it.

friend: is it tofu sushi or somthing?

me: well, there some tofu in it

friends friend and friend: eww!

me: what are you ewwing about, between the two of you you hav eaten about 10 pounds worth of sushi in the past ten minuites, hell, the sushi you are eating now has tofu in it, lots of kinds of sushi has tofu in it.

friend's friend: I didn't know this was a vegetarian restraunt, i think im going to be sick

me: this is not a vegegarian restraunt, you just ordered some chicken dish about a minuite ago

friends friend: if its not a vegetarian restraunt than why did they put tofu in the sushi?

me: because thats how they make lots of sushi, they do it in japan like that too

friends friend: i didnt know the japanese were all vegetarians

me: there not

friends friend: then why do they eat tofu?

me: do you even know what tofu is?

friends friend: the stuff vegetarians eat



it only went downhill from that point, but it was amusing at least





Who's on first?
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#3580 Old 05-09-2005, 04:53 PM
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gguru, that was one of the most HILARIOUS stories I have read in awhile! While it was happening, I'm sure it was frustrating, but reading about it takes the cake!

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#3581 Old 05-10-2005, 03:37 PM
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I was having dinner with my mom today and I was having tofurky and stuffing (which was made seperate from the regular stuffing that was put inside the actual turkey). My mother was eating turkey and the stuffing from inside the turkey.



Anyway, my mom made an odd face at my tofurky and said "That's such a gross food. How can you eat that?"



I said "You're eating stuffin out of a dead bird's vagina and MY food is disgusting? Riiiiight."
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#3582 Old 05-10-2005, 04:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VegKitten84 View Post

I was having dinner with my mom today and I was having tofurky and stuffing (which was made seperate from the regular stuffing that was put inside the actual turkey). My mother was eating turkey and the stuffing from inside the turkey.



Anyway, my mom made an odd face at my tofurky and said "That's such a gross food. How can you eat that?"



I said "You're eating stuffin out of a dead bird's vagina and MY food is disgusting? Riiiiight."



/me dies laughing



That's the best answer ever! Honestly
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#3583 Old 05-10-2005, 04:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VegKitten84 View Post

I was having dinner with my mom today and I was having tofurky and stuffing (which was made seperate from the regular stuffing that was put inside the actual turkey). My mother was eating turkey and the stuffing from inside the turkey.



Anyway, my mom made an odd face at my tofurky and said "That's such a gross food. How can you eat that?"



I said "You're eating stuffin out of a dead bird's vagina and MY food is disgusting? Riiiiight."





I bet that comment went over well.

You're my hero for saying that.... someday I'll get up the nerve, but for now I usually just take it because I can't stand getting into an "argument" with people who have no facts whatsoever. It cracks me up everytime when some random person just says 'that's not true...' , then proceeds to tell me whatever their imagination thinks up. Because obviously they have much more acurate information about veg*nism and the meat industy...



PS: I love tofurky

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#3584 Old 05-11-2005, 02:42 AM
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Originally Posted by SuntoryTime View Post

/me dies laughing

<--- thinks he's spotted an IRC user
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#3585 Old 05-11-2005, 10:47 AM
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Originally Posted by anthony11 View Post

<--- thinks he's spotted an IRC user



Actually, I'm not. I got used to doing the /me thing because almost everyone I talk to online (MSN and other forums) does it too. *shrug*
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#3586 Old 05-11-2005, 11:08 AM
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/me understands
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#3587 Old 05-11-2005, 07:55 PM
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The other day I was sitting with the guy I'm seeing and this woman, and she just realized I'm vegetarian, her response:



"Awww you poor thing!"



I was like what?? And gave a dirty look...and the guy I'm seeing piped up "Yeah, that's what she says too, poor thing, but about the dead animals". Nice
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#3588 Old 05-11-2005, 08:35 PM
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Originally Posted by bluegrrrl79 View Post

The other day I was sitting with the guy I'm seeing and this woman, and she just realized I'm vegetarian, her response:



"Awww you poor thing!"




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#3589 Old 05-12-2005, 09:09 AM
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What, is vegetarianism an illness now?



At least your guy had a nice comeback.
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#3590 Old 05-12-2005, 10:34 AM
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A teasing friend of mine told me that he could "handle me having that disorder of vegetarianism." I laughed and told him,"Yes, I'm a happily disordered vegetarian!" He wasn't serious, and even if he were, I wouldn't waste my time getting offended.

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#3591 Old 05-13-2005, 08:15 AM
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Kid - Have you got yourself checked out yet? (referring to a lecture my teacher gave me last week, saying I need to get regular checkups)

Me - Nope.

Kid - Haha, you're going to die! You know that, right? You're gonna die of mo-nutrition, or whatever that's called.

Me - Okay.

Kid - I'm not gonna die though. You know why? because I eat MEAT! And I drink MILK! That's good for me. I'm not gonna die.
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#3592 Old 05-13-2005, 11:46 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gnarly View Post

Kid - Have you got yourself checked out yet? (referring to a lecture my teacher gave me last week, saying I need to get regular checkups)

Me - Nope.

Kid - Haha, you're going to die! You know that, right? You're gonna die of mo-nutrition, or whatever that's called.

Me - Okay.

Kid - I'm not gonna die though. You know why? because I eat MEAT! And I drink MILK! That's good for me. I'm not gonna die.



I don't know whether to or do this --->

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#3593 Old 05-13-2005, 10:50 PM
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The awesome thing about kids is though they soak up info from everywhere and spew it back out at you, if you can point them toward the right information, they take to it better than many adults.

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#3594 Old 05-14-2005, 09:15 AM
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My best friend says that your body is designed to eat red meat and when you are tired or run down, that is your body's way of saying that it needs a burger or a steak. I have given up trying say otherwise
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#3595 Old 05-14-2005, 09:45 AM
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What they hey? Your friend isnt very informed.



I know a lady who gets extremely tired if she eats red meat. She was riding on the back of a motorcycle after eating beef and she feel asleep.
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#3596 Old 05-15-2005, 09:21 PM
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Wife: Hi, I'm calling to find out if anything on your menu is free of meat and animal products.

Restaurant: Yes, the fruit salad.

Wife: Is there anything else at all? What about the oatmeal?

Restaurant: Prepared in milk.

Wife: Hashbrowns?

Restaurant: Prepared in butter.

Wife: And there's nothing else that I could order without the meat, cheese, milk, or eggs?

Restaurant: Oh sure! We have a tuna sandwich that you can get without the cheese.



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#3597 Old 05-16-2005, 05:02 AM
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More proof that fish grow on trees
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#3598 Old 05-16-2005, 06:05 PM
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Mark, at least they were honest about the hashbrowns and oatmeal.

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#3599 Old 05-16-2005, 11:44 PM
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friend: (in frustration) "why can't you eat meat and be like normal people!"

me: (I forget what I said, but this is what I WANTED to say) "why can't you eat plants and be like compassionate people!"

It's not in what you say, it's in what you do (Oasis)

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#3600 Old 05-17-2005, 07:50 AM
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She is still alive, isn't she?





Quote:
Originally Posted by Good Populace View Post

What they hey? Your boyfriend isnt very informed.



I know a lady who gets extremely tired if she eats red meat. She was riding on the back of a motorcycle after eating beef and she feel asleep.

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