Pregnant and looking for a Veg* adoptive family. - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 01-26-2011, 12:13 PM
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When I found out, I knew that my plan was adoption. The one thing that stuck out in my mind is: I want my child to be raised vegetarian. I'm having a really hard time finding resources! It's really hard to think that I may have to compromise my core values and settle with a family that doesn't share those values...
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#2 Old 01-26-2011, 12:20 PM
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If you go through an adoption agency, is there a way for them to find a vegetarian family? Or a screening process that you could do yourself?


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#3 Old 01-26-2011, 01:43 PM
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Hi, and welcome to VB!

I just wanted to let you know that I am a birthmother to 2-year-old twins. If you want someone to talk to, pm me.

As for finding a veg adoptive family, this may provide with some difficulties. Are you going through an agency? You can speak with your counselor and they could possibly help you find a vegetarian family.
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#4 Old 01-26-2011, 01:44 PM
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I hope there is a way for them to find vegetarian families and since it's so important to me I figure I can turn down families that don't meet my criteria. Thats gonna be hard I have issues saying no to people (which sounds silly, I know.) Also I just have this fear I'll run out of time.
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#5 Old 01-26-2011, 02:21 PM
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I wish I knew the right approach for you to take with this...
Good luck with finding a family you're comfortable with and also with the pregnancy itself.
Us on VB will help in any way we can
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#6 Old 01-27-2011, 10:31 AM
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I'm a prospective adoptive parent so I've done some research on adoption. May I share some resources with you?

Before you decide what kind of people you'd like to adopt your child, you should consider if adoption is really the right choice for you. Remember that as your pregnancy progresses you may change your mind. And after you give birth you may also have different feelings. So try to prepare emotionally for all these decisions and don't be too quick to agree to anything.

If you choose adoption, then you can think about what kind of adoption you want to have. Do you want closed, open, semi-open? Here is a good factsheet that can help you decide:
http://family.findlaw.com/adoption/a...tion-pros.html

And here is a state-by-state guide for laws related to open adoption contracts:
http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwi...erativeall.pdf

Once you've decided what kind of adoption you want, then you can start narrowing down the agencies or individuals who can help match you with a prospective adoptive parent or couple who fulfill your desires. If I were in your position I would choose an agency that followed government guidelines and didn't have a bad record of fraud, matched my religious beliefs, that offered counseling, and had access to a wide variety of prospective adoptive parents from which to choose. I would tell them I wanted vegetarian/vegan parents and I'd make sure to remind them of that every chance I get.

Here are some more resources for you:
http://www.childwelfare.gov/adoption...regnant_women/
http://www.childwelfare.gov/nfcad/

I wish you well with your pregnancy and your decision.
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#7 Old 01-27-2011, 12:05 PM
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There are so many criteria that prospective adoptive parents have to meet in order to be considered, that your chances of finding them all met and having them be vegetarian as well are very slim. If you want to retain that much control over your child's diet, perhaps you should think about raising it yourself?

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#8 Old 01-27-2011, 02:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nishani View Post

There are so many criteria that prospective adoptive parents have to meet in order to be considered, that your chances of finding them all met and having them be vegetarian as well are very slim. If you want to retain that much control over your child's diet, perhaps you should think about raising it yourself?

I don't think that's accurate. About 5-10% of the US population is vegetarian or nearly vegetarian. To put that in perspective, only about 2% of the US population is Jewish.
Many birth parents choose adoptive parents based on religion and/or ethnicity. I don't see this as significantly different.
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#9 Old 01-27-2011, 06:08 PM
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There are many couples that are wanting to adopt a little one and perhaps they are Vegeterians or Vegans I am not sure. I am sorry your struck with this difficult situation however, I hope the best of your process.
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#10 Old 01-27-2011, 11:49 PM
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I heard about this couple recently through a running/healthy living blog. Not sure if they are veg but maybe it wouldn't hurt to find out? http://www.kleinersadopt.blogspot.com/
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#11 Old 01-28-2011, 05:49 PM
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Well I can see where you can view it that way, but it's not a control issue. It's a core value of mine and after all this pregnancy business I'd like for one of my main beliefs to be observed by the adoptive parents. I don't think it's too much to ask. Now mind you I'm not asking non-vegetarians to adhere to my beliefs. (not only that I don't think they'd really know how to feed a vegetarian child)
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#12 Old 01-28-2011, 05:57 PM
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Thank you ElaineV, I do really know that this is the right option for me. Parenting is not something I'm capable of right now, unfortunately. I always wanted children and it breaks my heart that I'm faced with this unplanned (not unwanted) pregnancy at a time when it's impossible for me to do this. I will check out the links! I did get to speak with an adoption agency today to go over my plan and some profies of prospective adoptive parents. My counselor only found one family close to my criteria! However she did mention that she will be my counselor through this process and I'm more than welcome to talk to a national based adoption agency and look at their profiles. So I'm excited to see what else is out there!
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#13 Old 01-28-2011, 06:27 PM
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Maybe it would be easier to find families that are adopting in areas that you know have a high volume of vegetarians...?

"I think it's naive to pray for world peace if we're not going to change the form in which we live." Godfrey Reggio
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#14 Old 11-28-2012, 12:23 PM
 
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I know this is long after the fact, but as a vegan and a birth mother myself in the past, I wanted to commend you on your bravery going through this whole process of seeking adoptive parents who share your values.  I hope it all worked out for you.  I am now on the other side of this pathway and looking to adopt children, so it is beautiful for me to know that there are birth mothers out there who are veg* and are interested in similar values in the parents they choose.  Have a beautiful day.

~Faith

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#15 Old 05-05-2014, 08:05 PM
 
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I just found this old post. Thank you for posting. I am vegan and a future adoptive parent, so this gives me hope.

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