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Any other LGBTQ VB'ers?

post #1 of 1039
5/18/09 at 11:11pm
Thread Starter 
I'm sure there must be some other LGBTQ folks here! I'm personally a single lesbian, and some of my closest friends are gay, lesbian, and transgendered. I'm just curious about other LGBTQ folk here, so go ahead and say hi!



Also, I was wondering if anyone else has gotten this from people: when some people have found out I am veg, they would often make jokes about the fact that I "must be a lesbian" due to my feminist views and diet choices. It really ticked me off, since it made me feel as though I was being made into a stereotype. My sexual orientation is not a choice (though it is part of who I am) and is totally separate from my dietary choices, which I *DO* see as a choice. But some people seem determined to make a connection between the two, as though I am just some sort of caricature. Has anyone else had this experience?
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post #2 of 1039
5/19/09 at 12:05am
Yup, I'm an out lesbian. I suppose I fit a stereotype in some ways (lefty, veg, feminist and so on), I know what you mean though. We're people, not cliches. I'm not stereotypical in other ways. I'm feminine-looking, which means I have to constantly come out to new people because they assume I'm straight. Sigh. I'm also hopeless at home and car repairs, heh. I do have a pair of Birkenstocks, though.
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post #3 of 1039
5/19/09 at 1:39am
I'm some variation of bi/pan/anthrosexual. I'm bisexual women's rep on my Uni's LGBT Welfare/Activism type group. I used to identify as lesbian when I was in a relationship with a woman and yeah, I had a few experiences of my vegetarianism/lesbianism being linked, but only as passing jokes. I don't see my orientation and veg*nism as being linked either, like you said - one is a choice, and one isn't. But I do see my views on LGBT (and all the other people who got left out of the acronym!) rights, and on animal rights, as being linked - it's all liberation issues and things that should bloody well be common sense.
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post #4 of 1039
5/19/09 at 10:22am
I'm a walking stereotype in a lot of ways,

a white, upper middle class, bisexual, vegetarian female with a post secondary education and lots of dirty hippy tree hugging ways.



Doesn't bother me at all , but then again, I've never had anyone but close friends who also fall into the same category comment on it.



I don't feel that sexuality has anything to do with my vegetarianism, but my education and left leaning political views sure do.
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Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavanto

'May everyone everywhere be happy
May the whole world be joyous'
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http://bringingyouohm.wordpress.com/

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavanto

'May everyone everywhere be happy
May the whole world be joyous'
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post #5 of 1039
5/19/09 at 10:48am
I'm none of the above (except veggie, of course!), but what does the Q stand for? I hear/see LGBT all the time, but never the Q.



Sorry if this is a really stupid question... I just got out of a brain-devouring Statistics class. XD
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post #6 of 1039
5/19/09 at 12:18pm
I came out as bisexual this year, telling my friends I'd had relationships with girls and guys in the past, and that I was attracted to both sexes. They were very supportive but I had a lot of, "Ohhhh, well, that explains it."



Meaning???



"Well, you're a hippy feminist and into environmental issues and whatnot. It makes sense that you're bisexual."



Um, yeah, thanks a lot. Now I'm a walking stereotype.



For the record, I proudly call myself a feminist and I strive so much to get rid of the stigma that comes attached to that word. Now I'm supposedly "not helping matters" by being attracted to women.
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post #7 of 1039
5/19/09 at 12:21pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sewwattsnew View Post

I'm none of the above (except veggie, of course!), but what does the Q stand for? I hear/see LGBT all the time, but never the Q.



Sorry if this is a really stupid question... I just got out of a brain-devouring Statistics class. XD



"Questioning". For those who are still trying to figure themselves out.
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post #8 of 1039
5/19/09 at 12:52pm
that or "Queer". I've seen the acronym written with two Qs, even
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post #9 of 1039
5/19/09 at 2:19pm
I'm bi. Well, pan, if you're familiar. I've been with guys, girls... one of my ex's is transitioning ftm, but still identified as female when I was with him. Either way... to me... it's what's between your ears, not what's between your legs. I can be attracted to female, male, ftm, mtf, other, who knows... it's what's INSIDE that matters to me.
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post #10 of 1039
5/19/09 at 4:06pm
Chalk me up to the B and T letters of that acronym. I'm very open with my bisexuality (I suppose I don't help the stereotype that vegans are bi/homosexual, do I? ), but only a few people actually know about my transsexualism (MTF, pre-op). It's a bit more awkward to talk about really, since while bisexuality is vaguely accepted in society, transsexualism most definitely isn't.



Quote:
Originally Posted by wutaweirdo View Post

Either way... to me... it's what's between your ears, not what's between your legs. I can be attracted to female, male, ftm, mtf, other, who knows... it's what's INSIDE that matters to me.



I know that's what I should be thinking, but I get driven insane by it. I want to be comfortable with myself, you know? I hate my body the way it is now, which isn't good for you no matter how you look at it.
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post #11 of 1039
5/19/09 at 5:31pm
In a sense, I think everyone is Questioning their entire lives. Some just try to hide it.
"They call this war a cloud over the land. But they made the weather and then they stand in the rain and say '$#!±, it's raining!'"  Ruby, in "Cold Mountain"
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"They call this war a cloud over the land. But they made the weather and then they stand in the rain and say '$#!±, it's raining!'"  Ruby, in "Cold Mountain"
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post #12 of 1039
5/19/09 at 7:10pm
Bisexual Feminist here
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post #13 of 1039
5/19/09 at 7:57pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by thegibbonator;2324419



I know that's what I [i View Post

should[/i] be thinking, but I get driven insane by it. I want to be comfortable with myself, you know? I hate my body the way it is now, which isn't good for you no matter how you look at it.



I don't think wutaweirdo was trying to imply that transexuals have misplaced priorities for wanting to change 'whats between the legs,' just that the aformentioned genitalia doesn't matter to her/him as far as attractiveness.
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post #14 of 1039
5/20/09 at 1:35am
Straight guy, but with many L&G friends and relatives, and I was raised around the gay and lesbian community. Checking in to give support.



Oh, and Gibbonator- you like Dream Theater so you're automatically cool.
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post #15 of 1039
5/20/09 at 2:31am
Quote:
Originally Posted by ripvanfish View Post

I don't think wutaweirdo was trying to imply that transexuals have misplaced priorities for wanting to change 'whats between the legs,' just that the aformentioned genitalia doesn't matter to her/him as far as attractiveness.



Ah right, that makes more sense.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeffuary View Post

Straight guy, but with many L&G friends and relatives, and I was raised around the gay and lesbian community. Checking in to give support.



Oh, and Gibbonator- you like Dream Theater so you're automatically cool.



"Like" is a huge understatement. I'm completely and utterly obsessed with them!
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post #16 of 1039
5/20/09 at 4:45am
Quote:
Originally Posted by thegibbonator View Post

Chalk me up to the B and T letters of that acronym. I'm very open with my bisexuality (I suppose I don't help the stereotype that vegans are bi/homosexual, do I? ), but only a few people actually know about my transsexualism (MTF, pre-op). It's a bit more awkward to talk about really, since while bisexuality is vaguely accepted in society, transsexualism most definitely isn't.



I know that's what I should be thinking, but I get driven insane by it. I want to be comfortable with myself, you know? I hate my body the way it is now, which isn't good for you no matter how you look at it.



Just on a more positive note, everyone hates their body at some stage or another (regardless of gender). Even Lebron James must've hated his body at one point...lol



But trans-sexualism is definitely something that many people object. It seems like society just isn't ready for it at this point in time. Time will tell.
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post #17 of 1039
5/20/09 at 9:10am
Chalk another one up for a bisexual feminist.



I am just recently "out" to friends and family as bisexual. It was soemthing I had been questioning/pondering for a long time. Really just trying to figure out if it was just a fantasy or something that I would act upon. About a year ago I started dating a woman and everything clicked for me.



I am currently in a long term relationship with a man, although he does give me the option to date a woman as well if I choose to (which I am thankful for, some men simply are not comfortable with that). I love my boyfriend and I think he is attractive, but I find females far more attractive than men. I always find myself looking at women as opposed to men.
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post #18 of 1039
5/20/09 at 9:31am
I personally am straight, but an ally of the LGBTQQA community and a feminist. (My local feminist community sometimes uses this acronym, adding "Questioning, queer, and asexual to the acronym - making it more complete but somewhat burdensome in length!)



In case any of you are unaware, Pride season is coming up, and many of you probably have local LGBTQQA groups who will be putting on many events which need volunteers! I will be volunteering at the alternative prom for youth, put on by the Capital District Gay & Lesbian Community Council here in Albany, as well as at "Ye Olde Gay Albany," an event for senior LGBTQQA folks who have been active in the community for a loooong time.



For those of you interested in these issues and who have the time, look into volunteering!
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post #19 of 1039
5/20/09 at 11:45am
I am def. looking forward to Pride Fest in Milwaukee, WI this year. Around 15,000 people attend every year.



http://www.pridefest.com/
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post #20 of 1039
5/20/09 at 6:54pm
Ooh, okay. "Questioning" totally makes sense.



Quote:
I personally am straight, but an ally of the LGBTQQA community and a feminist. (My local feminist community sometimes uses this acronym, adding "Questioning, queer, and asexual to the acronym - making it more complete but somewhat burdensome in length!)



O.O That's a lot of letters...



I always thought "queer" was just slang/an alternate term for "gay"... what's the difference?





Oh, and while I'm straight, I'm totally supportive of/cool with sexual orientations that are different from mine (which I guess would be LGBTQQA; now I get to use the bulky acronym!)
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post #21 of 1039
5/20/09 at 6:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by a7dk View Post


In case any of you are unaware, Pride season is coming up, and many of you probably have local LGBTQQA groups who will be putting on many events which need volunteers! I will be volunteering at the alternative prom for youth, put on by the Capital District Gay & Lesbian Community Council here in Albany, as well as at "Ye Olde Gay Albany," an event for senior LGBTQQA folks who have been active in the community for a loooong time.



For those of you interested in these issues and who have the time, look into volunteering!



I know I'll be volunscripted, hehe... My best friend and future roommate is the promotions and marketing director of the busiest and best GLBTQ nightclub in the city, and I have been told I'm helping out with a bunch of events. Should be good times.



Hey, I just realized I'm moving into a very rainbow household in 10 days...

We have a gay man, a lebsian and me, the token Bi girl. We'll have to find a flag or sticker for the window
http://bringingyouohm.wordpress.com/

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavanto

'May everyone everywhere be happy
May the whole world be joyous'
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http://bringingyouohm.wordpress.com/

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavanto

'May everyone everywhere be happy
May the whole world be joyous'
Reply
post #22 of 1039
5/20/09 at 7:07pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
I always thought "queer" was just slang/an alternate term for "gay"... what's the difference?



"Queer" is often used by people who feel they don't fit into a clearly-defined label (like lesbian, male or female, gay, etc). It can be used by people to describe their sexuality or their gender identity. For instance, "gender queer" refers to an individual who feels they don't fit into either a male or female identity, but somewhere in between or totally seperate (or in some cases, they feel they alternate between male and female).



Queer is also what some people refer to as a "reclaimed" word - it was originally derogative, but was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community as a way of expressing pride. So for some LGBTQ folks, identifying as "queer" instead of lesbian, bi, or gay etc is a way of expressing pride and individuality. Some folks just hate labels, and use queer as a way of identifying as different, without putting themselves into a specific box or label.



It's sort of an umbrella term in some ways, as people who are bi, lesbian, gay, etc can all identify with the term queer.



But there are so many identities and vastly different POV's within the LGBTQ community, it can mean different things to different people or groups.



Hope that clears it up a bit!
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post #23 of 1039
5/20/09 at 7:18pm
Questioning describes me.. I want to say bisexual, but I've never had a romantic or sexual relationship with a girl--there have been girls I've wanted to ask out but I'm always too scared of rejection...
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post #24 of 1039
5/20/09 at 11:21pm
Tallying in as a gay male feminist!! I would say that the vast majority of my friends are women, both straight and gay.



As for being vegetarian, I would have to agree with previous posts that for me being vegie is a choice, while being gay most certainly isn't. And, except for me, none of my lesbian/gay friends are veg*n. The only veg*ns that I know are straight.
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post #25 of 1039
5/20/09 at 11:26pm
Oh, and as for the gender based toy commercials, it swings both ways. What about the little boys who want to play with dolls and such, but are only given toy trucks, helicopters, etc.
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post #26 of 1039
5/20/09 at 11:53pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Oh, and as for the gender based toy commercials, it swings both ways. What about the little boys who want to play with dolls and such, but are only given toy trucks, helicopters, etc



Oh, definitely! I agree! I should have pointed that out in my original rant about gender-based ads.
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post #27 of 1039
5/21/09 at 1:26am
I suppose I'm somewhere between straight and bi/questioning. I was in the Gay-Straight Alliance in high school; think I was the only straight female not that there were a lot of us, though, mind you.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Skittles View Post

I love my boyfriend and I think he is attractive, but I find females far more attractive than men. I always find myself looking at women as opposed to men.

Exactly! Except the boyfriend part. I'm missing one of those :P Personally, I find women more attractive than men. I've only dated men, though (and admittedly not many). I've always identified as straight. I grew up being told that "if you like boys but think girls are pretty, it's just a 'girl crush,' and you're straight." Not in a "it's bad to like girls" way, that wasn't really it. It's started to occur to me recently that I actually am attracted to girls sometimes, not just think they're pretty I haven't dated any women, but the idea has started to seem quite normal to me (for me, I mean - I already thought of it as normal for other people).



Quote:
Originally Posted by czar2004 View Post

Oh, and as for the gender based toy commercials, it swings both ways. What about the little boys who want to play with dolls and such, but are only given toy trucks, helicopters, etc.



Argh, those annoy me. That and laundry commercials always feature women doing the laundry, never men.
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post #28 of 1039
5/21/09 at 4:51am
PM'd ya
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post #29 of 1039
5/21/09 at 8:32am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Earthly Delight View Post

Questioning describes me.. I want to say bisexual

Same-ish.



From one standpoint I agree with Kinsey's studies and believe that most everybody is somewhat bisexual (whether it's latent or they're simply repressing it). Personally, I've had relations with both but actual relationships with neither (probably came closer to dating guys).



Publicly, I don't really declare myself anything. I don't share my attraction to people with other people, so some people read me as straight up asexual.



As far as a link between vegness and LGBTQ-ness, I think that if there's any link maybe it's openness to others and acceptance of others. So, not a really a link so much as what is almost an obligation for the veg community to accept the LGBTQ community as they are embracing all species.
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post #30 of 1039
5/21/09 at 8:34am
Quote:
Originally Posted by rockindancer86 View Post


Exactly! Except the boyfriend part. I'm missing one of those :P Personally, I find women more attractive than men. I've only dated men, though (and admittedly not many). I've always identified as straight. I grew up being told that "if you like boys but think girls are pretty, it's just a 'girl crush,' and you're straight." Not in a "it's bad to like girls" way, that wasn't really it. It's started to occur to me recently that I actually am attracted to girls sometimes, not just think they're pretty I haven't dated any women, but the idea has started to seem quite normal to me (for me, I mean - I already thought of it as normal for other people).



I def. encourage you to try dating a woman if you are curious. There is no harm in trying it and seeing if it right for you. I always thought that my attraction to females was not in sexual or relationship kind of way, more that I just thought they were attractive. I always had fantasies about women and as I got older the feelings did not subside. The more I looked inward and considered the possiblity of dating women... I had to honest with myself and I decided that I would dicuss it with my boyfriend and if he was comfortable with it... that I would try dating a woman. It is probably one of the best decisions that I have made. I no longer have to wonder and question my feelings. I felt very liberated and complete.
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