Corrupt Someone's Wish - VeggieBoards

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#1 Old 08-07-2011, 12:50 PM
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This is a new game where each poster makes a wish, and the next person has to grant it but ruin it at the same time.

For example:

"I wish for £10,000,000"

"Wish granted. Your whole family have died and left you a secret hoard of £10,000,000."

I wish for a pet pony.
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#2 Old 08-07-2011, 04:36 PM
 
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This is horrible...I love it.

Wish granted, but he doesn't have legs and is fond of biting

I wish for school to start tomorrow.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#3 Old 08-07-2011, 04:59 PM
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I wish for school to start tomorrow.

Wish granted, but there will be no AC or high-speed internet at the school, and all of your teachers will have bad breath and horrible body odor.

I wish there were no more wars.
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#4 Old 08-07-2011, 05:07 PM
 
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Wish granted, but there will be no AC or high-speed internet at the school, and all of your teachers will have bad breath and horrible body odor.

I wish there were no more wars.

Granted. Instead of war, people just murder one another indiscriminately while listening to that crappy "Imagine" song over and over again.

I wish I could eat all the sweets I want and not gain an ounce or suffer bad health.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#5 Old 08-07-2011, 05:56 PM
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I wish I could eat all the sweets I want and not gain an ounce or suffer bad health.

Wish granted, but bunnies not fortunate enough to be prey, will be unable to eat and die slow, painful deaths.

I wish granted wishes didn't come with negative side effects.
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#6 Old 08-07-2011, 05:58 PM
 
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Wish granted, but bunnies not fortunate enough to be prey, will be unable to eat and die slow, painful deaths.

I wish granted wishes didn't come with negative side effects.

Granted, but...

oh, I see what you did there. Clever, amigo, very clever.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
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#7 Old 08-07-2011, 06:02 PM
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So not to end the game, I wish there were higher standards for television shows.
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#8 Old 08-07-2011, 06:04 PM
 
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So not to end the game, I wish there were higher standards for television shows.

Granted, but the quality shows only last for one season (wait...)

I wish this weird tingling in my throat would go away.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#9 Old 08-07-2011, 06:08 PM
 
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Granted, but it's moved to your butt.

I wish Lola would behave.

Who needs sleep when we've got love?
Who needs keys when we've got clubs?
Who needs please when we've got guns?
Who needs peace when we've gone above?
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#10 Old 08-07-2011, 06:10 PM
 
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Granted!

She'll behave...and then she will reproduce, birthing a litter of 8 incorrigible pups!!!

I wish I had a beautiful dinner waiting for me at home that I could enjoy.

"Yes! Live! Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!" Auntie Mame
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#11 Old 08-07-2011, 06:11 PM
 
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Granted!

She'll behave...and then she will reproduce, birthing a litter of 8 incorrigible pups!!!

Oh no! *faints at the idea of EIGHT misbehavin' mavens.*

Who needs sleep when we've got love?
Who needs keys when we've got clubs?
Who needs please when we've got guns?
Who needs peace when we've gone above?
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#12 Old 08-07-2011, 06:12 PM
 
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I wish that Kibble and Ahimsa would make wishes.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#13 Old 08-07-2011, 06:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by sequoia View Post

I wish that Kibble and Ahimsa would make wishes.

Sweet thang, I did!

"Yes! Live! Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!" Auntie Mame
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#14 Old 08-07-2011, 06:14 PM
 
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Originally Posted by *AHIMSA* View Post

Granted!

She'll behave...and then she will reproduce, birthing a litter of 8 incorrigible pups!!!

I wish I had a beautiful dinner waiting for me at home that I could enjoy.

Your wish is granted, but the kitchen will be a complete mess, with dishes and pots and pans and utensils piled high in the sink and grease covering the counters, floors and walls and nobody else will be there to clean it up for you.

I wish I had a beautiful singing voice that thrills everyone who hears me sing.

*this space not for sale*
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#15 Old 08-07-2011, 06:15 PM
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I wish I had a beautiful singing voice that thrills everyone who hears me sing.

Wish granted, but you'll be unable to speak without doing the Dougie.

I wish I could do the Dougie.
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#16 Old 08-07-2011, 06:15 PM
 
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Your wish is granted, but the kitchen will be a complete mess, with dishes and pots and pans and utensils piled high in the sink and grease covering the counters, floors and walls and nobody else will be there to clean it up for you.

I wish I had a beautiful singing voice that thrills everyone who hears me sing.

Granted, but it also attracts birds to you and now everything you own is covered in feathers and poo.

I wish I could run without my knee hurting.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#17 Old 08-07-2011, 06:16 PM
 
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I wish I had a beautiful singing voice that thrills everyone who hears me sing.

Granted, but now you can't go anywhere without singing disney-movie style about your life.

I wish that The Boy would clean up all his junk.

Who needs sleep when we've got love?
Who needs keys when we've got clubs?
Who needs please when we've got guns?
Who needs peace when we've gone above?
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#18 Old 08-07-2011, 06:16 PM
 
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Originally Posted by *AHIMSA* View Post

Granted!

She'll behave...and then she will reproduce, birthing a litter of 8 incorrigible pups!!!

I wish I had a beautiful dinner waiting for me at home that I could enjoy.

Granted but the person who made it thinks fish are part of a vegetarian diet so you have ceaser salad with grilled halibut and a side of asparagus smothered in butter.

I wish to be a beautiful, rich, famous, burlesque artiest.

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."
 Marilyn Monroe
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#19 Old 08-07-2011, 06:18 PM
 
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Granted, but now you can't go anywhere without singing disney-movie style about your life.

I wish that The Boy would clean up all his junk.

I was slow.

Granted. He cleans up his junk and moves out, leaving you. (Sorry best I could think of.)

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."
 Marilyn Monroe
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#20 Old 08-07-2011, 06:18 PM
 
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Granted but the person who made it thinks fish are part of a vegetarian diet so you have ceaser salad with grilled halibut and a side of asparagus smothered in butter.

I wish to be a beautiful, rich, famous, burlesque artiest.

Granted! You are that, and while on a cruise your ship takes a detour to a private island where you are held captive by a crazed lesbian billionaire!

I wish to have all my work laundry DONE!

"Yes! Live! Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!" Auntie Mame
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#21 Old 08-07-2011, 06:26 PM
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I wish to have all my work laundry DONE!

Wish granted, but every song ever made will be sung by Justin Bieber.

I wish the NFL season would start tomorrow.
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#22 Old 08-07-2011, 06:30 PM
 
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Wish granted, but every song ever made will be sung my Justin Bieber.

I wish the NFL season would start tomorrow.

Granted, but all your favorite teams will lose.

I wish football didn't exist.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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#23 Old 08-07-2011, 06:34 PM
 
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Granted, but all your favorite teams will lose.

I wish football didn't exist.

Granted, but it's been replaced with rugby.

I wish Iron chef would do a vegetarian challenge.

Who needs sleep when we've got love?
Who needs keys when we've got clubs?
Who needs please when we've got guns?
Who needs peace when we've gone above?
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#24 Old 08-07-2011, 06:55 PM
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I wish Iron chef would do a vegetarian challenge.

Wish granted, but cats and dogs would be unable to survive without eating babies.

I wish unprotected sex led to more positive things instead of babies and sexually-transmitted diseases.
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#25 Old 08-07-2011, 06:57 PM
 
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Granted but it is only in the ear.


I wish I was in and out of school already with a successful career.

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."
 Marilyn Monroe
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#26 Old 08-07-2011, 07:19 PM
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I wish I was in and out of school already with a successful career.

Wish granted, but Dick Cheney will be president.

I wish women were able to wear whatever they wanted without fear of being sexually assaulted or raped.
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#27 Old 08-07-2011, 07:57 PM
 
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Granted, but that means enduring lifetime verbal abuse for wearing purple harem pants with sequins together with a see-through psychedelic sports bra, a ratty old red velvet coat with faux fox fur trim and black leather boots with spiked heels.

I wish my three cats would live together in peace, love and domestic harmony.

*this space not for sale*
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#28 Old 08-07-2011, 08:05 PM
 
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Granted, but then they will always show their "love" by pouncing and clawing you

I wish Summer lasted longer.

DON'T BRING MY MOTHER INTO THIS!
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#29 Old 08-07-2011, 08:28 PM
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Granted, but mosquitoes and other insects decide to come out and party all day and night now.

I wish it was earlier in the evening and I was on a beach in the Caribbean, watching the sun set from a lounge chair.

Direct action is always the clamorer, the initiator, through which the great sum of indifferentists become aware that oppression is getting intolerable. - Voltairine de Cleyre
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#30 Old 08-07-2011, 08:30 PM
 
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Granted, but mosquitoes and other insects decide to come out and party all day and night now.

I wish it was earlier in the evening and I was on a beach in the Caribbean, watching the sun set from a lounge chair.

Granted, but I'm there too

I wish it was winter right now.

"If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company."
Jean-Paul Sartre
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