Vegetarian wedding. I need help! :( - VeggieBoards

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#1 Old 06-12-2016, 05:36 AM
MCallen
 
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Nova Scotia
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Question Vegetarian wedding. I need help! :(

I need some help!

I have announced to a couple of people (mainly parents) that I would like a vegetarian wedding (I would prefer vegan but that isn't going to happen). We are making to food (buffet style) because we can't afford catering, however we have been getting some push back because of it.

Such as:
Your forcing your views on your guests
Not every one likes veggies
People will be disappointed not having meat there
(These are to list a couple)

Our responses to date:
Forcing us to serve meat at our wedding is pushing your views on us
- I told my sister she might have to figure out something for her boyfriend because he is so picky... literally he would eat meat, fries, pizza, garlic fingers, and pb&j sandwhiches.... He literally eats nothing in terms of fruits and veggies....
- There are 3 meals a days, 7 days a week, I am sure people can go without meat for one meal (we are allowing fish because of pushback).

I don't know what to do about the push back. I am thinking about making a small speech on why we went this route because I am transitioning vegan and my fiancee recently decided to go vegetarian or pescatarian (not sure which right now).... so we both don't eat meat now.... I am doing it for health, the animals and the environment and my fiancee started switching after I should him a video on the effects of animal agriculture on the environment. But I am extremely lost in what to do. Any suggestion would be helpful!!

Last edited by MCallen; 06-12-2016 at 07:28 AM.
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#2 Old 06-12-2016, 05:53 AM
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I just replied to this question in another forum where you said everything, but stated that you were still pescatarian. (vegetarians don't eat anything killed BTW)
Are you already vegetarian or not?

I will need to merge these threads so - which one?
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#3 Old 06-12-2016, 05:59 AM
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I just realized you said you were including fish!

Vegetarians do not eat anything that's killed. Meat comes from animals- birds, reptiles, mammals, insects, fish.

I know people say "pesco-vegetarian", but that's a complete oxymoron. It's like saying you're Kosher but still eat lobster mac and cheese!
The term that means fish is the only meat you eat is pescatarian

I'm surprised there would be that much push back about fish, esp in Nova Scotia!
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#4 Old 06-12-2016, 06:29 AM
MCallen
 
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I wasn't sure how to work this I found this thread after, and wasn't sure if I could edit/delete my initial one.

The wedding is actually in Newfoundland. :P

The thing is, I eat fish because it is still in my house since wanting to switch. I knew vegan is not eating anything animals or animal products and trying to classify what I am currently is difficult seeing how when you look of vegetarian there are a bunch of things listed.

I don't buy eggs, milk and meat anymore and only have a few items left containing them (a few pieces of frozen fish, expensive mayo, and some chocolate) that has been left over since starting the switch almost 3 months ago....

I am transitioning to vegan and the only reason I haven't is because these items are still in my house and I can't afford to waste them because we don't have much money for groceries and the damage is already done so might as well have not let them die in vain.

I can't even go through the meat section anymore without feeling guilty and disgusted because all the times I tried going completely vegetarian just seemed easier not too. But I am putting in the full commitment to go vegan... it is just taking a little bit of time to make sure I am doing it correctly to get enough nutrients, not wasting food and bringing substitutions into my home instead of meat, dairy and eggs. I am serious about the switch and wanted one of the biggest days of my life to be as cruelty free as possible, which is why I would have preferred all plant-based foods because that is where I am going with my lifestyle before the wedding.... I have seen to much to just ignore it and shut off my feelings anymore. I just need somewhere to turn besides for vegan youtube channels.

Last edited by MCallen; 06-12-2016 at 06:46 AM.
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#5 Old 06-12-2016, 07:08 AM
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Hey, you're doing fabulous!
The best way to look at being veg'n is to see it a journey, not a destination.
We have many Candian members, check out the Canada forum for shopping tips maybe?
http://www.veggieboards.com/forum/26-canada/
I always like when people have their country on the avatar because product ingredients and availability are so different.
And THIS-
Food Porn From the Internet
Make you drool! Yes, a lots complex, but there are also very doable recipes!

Believe me, it gets way easy after you break that 'glass ceiling' of food! You'll find ways to not only get around subsititutions, but even find them better.
Are cashews available there okay? I mean like not crazy expensive?
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#6 Old 06-12-2016, 07:23 AM
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Cashews can get pricey, there are more expensive than walnuts and they can go up to about $13.00 a pound. I don't even eat fresh fruits and veggies a lot of the time because it is too expensive, so I am left with beans, lentils, potatoes, pastas, bananas, frozen veggies such as corn and peas, and a few other things so I tend to eat fortified juices and milks subs. The exception would be apples, mushrooms and occasionally strawberries (which I love with coconut whipped cream). I have been researching a veg*n diet for a long time and now I am actually switching.

I have found many better things. I like Gardin Beefless ground better to put into accidentally vegan hamburger helpers, I much prefer veg*n chick'n wings over real ones (for longer than I was even switching), Tofu dogs (I was never fond of wieners anyways) and Tofurkey sausages. I love Cashew Nicecream (So Good) over regular icecream anytime. And the recipes I am finding..... amazing! I have been posting vegan recipes on my blog and making updates on my lifestyle transition. I also get takeout pizza with no cheese and I find it so much better.

I even made a vegan version of my favorite banana bread recipe and it tastes even better than the original!

Oh, I should of mentioned that I originally decided fish at the wedding but then I didn't want it because I am even phasing out fish, but it has to be put back on the table because of the push back.
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Last edited by MCallen; 06-12-2016 at 07:31 AM.
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#7 Old 06-13-2016, 01:25 AM
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It's your wedding, serve what you want. I think they are being childish if they don't want to eat vegetables so I would tell them too bad.


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#8 Old 06-19-2016, 05:57 AM
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On our wedding we served a vegetarian meal to 50 people. No one complained.

My usual answer: I have never heard a convincing reason to eat meat.
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#9 Old 06-19-2016, 11:11 AM
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Veggie dishes don't have to be (and shouldn't be) just salads and fruit. You mentioned that your sister's boyfriend likes fries and PB&J sandwiches - these are vegetarian foods.

Other "accidentally vegetarian" dishes include spaghetti and marinara sauce, cheese pizza, potato chips with dips, spicy chili made with meatless crumbles, Mexican nachos, and any of the hearty vegetarian Indian dishes featuring lentils and other legumes.

.
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_________

“Under the twinkling trees was a table covered with Guatemalan fabric, roses in juice jars, wax rose candles from Tijuana and plates of food — Weetzie's Vegetable Love-Rice, My Secret Agent Lover Man's guacamole, Dirk's homemade pizza, Duck's fig and berry salad and Surfer Surprise Protein Punch, Brandy-Lynn's pink macaroni, Coyote's cornmeal cakes, Ping's mushu plum crepes and Valentine's Jamaican plantain pie."

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#10 Old 07-08-2016, 10:49 AM
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I get it about having fish available at your wedding because your fiance still eats fish and might stay pescetarian. The buffet will reflect both your values. I think for people coming to the wedding, you shouldn't have to worry so much about whether they'll complain. Just let them know ahead of time what you'll be serving, and that you'll understand if they decide to sit this one out. It can be a sneaky way of paring back your guest list to people who really want to be there.

Cashews are great for the creamy sauces and cheese-like substances you can make with them, but yes to the comment about how expensive they are. I fall back a lot on peanuts with omni guests. Thai sauces made with peanut butter, lime, soy sauce, ginger and rice vinegar, and maybe some chopped peanuts mixed in. That gives you a sauce that works over rice or any kind of noodle. You can put scallions and sugar snap peas in the mix, but if there are people there who literally don't eat vegetables, Thai peanut sauce over a starch does tend to make people happy.
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#11 Old 07-08-2016, 12:35 PM
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Honestly I loathe the "push values" argument. Not everyone is a certain religion. If you were a strict roman catholic having the wedding placed in church, would you move your wedding because you had friends and/or family who were atheists? Same for the opposite. They either support you or don't.
If they are worried about starving from having to go meatless one meal offer bread rolls.
My *only* okay with food concerns and weddings is if a guest had an allergy. Fish and nut allergies are common but I wouldn't offer steak as an alternative. I rather enjoyed the spinach ravioli at the last wedding I went to.

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#12 Old 07-08-2016, 01:01 PM
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A wedding, by definition, is a ceremony celebrating the bride and groom. It is not designed for the guests, rather the bride and groom. The guests are there to honor you, not you them. Feel free to push whatever values you wish upon them. After all, it's your family/friends and they have been and will continue to push their values right back at you...
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#13 Old 12-28-2016, 09:24 PM
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As you already told, there are 3 meals and 7 days. People can skip one non veg meal.After all, it's a wedding right? No need to worry.
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#14 Old 12-30-2016, 03:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Persnickety View Post
Honestly I loathe the "push values" argument. Not everyone is a certain religion. If you were a strict roman catholic having the wedding placed in church, would you move your wedding because you had friends and/or family who were atheists? Same for the opposite. They either support you or don't.
Yes! THIS!

People are so weird these days.

You can make your own fancy celebration roast-style things for not a whole lot of money with wheat gluten. The EdgyVeg has a fantastic recipe. I've never tried it but it looks amazing. And meaty.

http://www.theedgyveg.com/2016/12/07...holiday-roast/

If your guest only wants PBJ, well, tell him PBJ is vegan. French fries are vegan. He already eats lots of vegan meals. Put jars of peanut butter and loaves of bread on the table for all the picky people.
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#15 Old 12-30-2016, 04:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MCallen View Post
I need some help!

I have announced to a couple of people (mainly parents) that I would like a vegetarian wedding (I would prefer vegan but that isn't going to happen). We are making to food (buffet style) because we can't afford catering, however we have been getting some push back because of it.

Such as:
Your forcing your views on your guests
Not every one likes veggies
People will be disappointed not having meat there
(These are to list a couple)

Our responses to date:
Forcing us to serve meat at our wedding is pushing your views on us
- I told my sister she might have to figure out something for her boyfriend because he is so picky... literally he would eat meat, fries, pizza, garlic fingers, and pb&j sandwhiches.... He literally eats nothing in terms of fruits and veggies....
- There are 3 meals a days, 7 days a week, I am sure people can go without meat for one meal (we are allowing fish because of pushback).

I don't know what to do about the push back. I am thinking about making a small speech on why we went this route because I am transitioning vegan and my fiancee recently decided to go vegetarian or pescatarian (not sure which right now).... so we both don't eat meat now.... I am doing it for health, the animals and the environment and my fiancee started switching after I should him a video on the effects of animal agriculture on the environment. But I am extremely lost in what to do. Any suggestion would be helpful!!
I say you just do what you want for your wedding personally. My wedding I let so many people push me around about so many things that the day ended up being more about what they wanted then what my husband and I wanted... if you don't want it then don't have it. They can get over it its your day not theirs they can put up without having meat for one meal. Do what will make you happy its your wedding.
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