Slightly different perspective: I have been what I call a strict vegetarian (not Vegan) for... probably 15 years now; I am paranoid about avoiding dairy due to allergies, and I eat a tiny bit of egg - about every 6 months when I see samples of dairy-free, but egg-bearing, muffins in Whole Foods, and I also eat some honey. I do it for health reasons. (wiping sweat from brow- there, I said it!!!) I was extremely sick at one time and could not even work, changing my diet literally made me a normal person and sealed my dedication to this way of eating.
When I began on this journey, I did a lot of research, and wondered if the word "Vegan" really applied to me, and I decided it just didn't feel right, for a variety of reasons. I did not feel good calling myself Vegan when I knew in my heart that I was not and likely never would be, I felt it was disrespectful to those who did work hard to stick to the lifestyle, so I have never called myself Vegan - and never really worried about it either.
When I moved in 2000 to take a job in another state and got involved in the veg community, I was shocked at the amount of "attitude" the Vegans would give non-Vegans... as well as any person that was not the right religion or political persuasion, did not donate money to animal rights groups, turn up for fur protests, volunteer enough (and by the way volunteers were usually crapped on by organizers), adopt enough stray animals, own a digital camera or sign the petition du jour (which was usually VERY poorly thought-out). And some of this was directed at me. I held my tongue as long as I could for like 4 years until an incident occurred that I just couldn't stomach, and overnight I gave up ALL my involvement in these groups. I finally realized I was never really going to be good enough to hang around with the cook kids, so I took my interests, time, effort, energy, kick-*** cake recipe and pretty smile elsewhere. I still go to an event now and then, but I have yet to find any good reason to get involved the way I once was. The only group I still support is my church's vegetarian dinner club - I'm on the steering committee and we have worked really hard to keep the garbage out - our group is mostly omnis who just like to try new and interesting food!! And we love them for it - boy have I got stories!!!
I can tell you that these attitude issues have really harmed the local vegetarian/vegan/animal rights community. I've watched several once-robust organizations get destroyed by in-fighting, including at least one feud that has gone on for over 20 years. The casual followers that could once be counted on to show up at every big event and even cough up a few bucks at fundraisers are sick of the drama, so they take their money and their hummus elsewhere.
Anyway, I'm sorry for the novel, but I appreciate the chance to vent and get that off my chest.