I am so sorry that you are struggling with depression. I understand that struggle and how hard it can be to overcome. I am also in surgical menopause as I lost both ovaries when I was 33 years old in 2005 and I understand the hell of that. I am on a hormone replacement patch as I can not live without it. I literally could not function at all with hotflashes, nightsweats, mood swings, anxiety and crying spells, body aches and joint pain, migraines, you name it. I know ALL ABOUT abrupt menopause at a young age. It is entirely possible, if your eye problems and depression are from some kind of menopause (whether from ovarian dysfunction or being too severely underweight or any number of causes) that a hormone replacement could really help instead of an antidepressant. Replacing the estrogen I lost (it took me three years to find a hormone replacement my body would absorb evenly and that raised my levels) made all the difference for my dry skin and to stop my hair falling out. I didn't have the eye problem, but I used to post on a surgical menopause online forum and it isn't uncommon for people in menopause to experience severe eye dryness. I can't think of what that is called. Sometimes younger women suffering menopause are put on a stronger birth control to control symptoms. Have you ever looked into this? My hormone replacement gave me back my life and helped lessen that terrible depression and mood swings I had. No antidepressant could do that because what my body was screaming for were the hormones it was missing.
I also take a vegan DHA/EPA on occasion. It is called DEVA brand and I order it online and one bottle lasts me three months or more. No need to take fish oil. You can also get omega 3s from plant sources like ground flaxseeds, walnuts, avocado and so on. There is also flaxseed oil that some people swear by. I know a lot of menopausal women use primrose oil too. I think you might have mentioned that.
I also want to mention that I had a LOT of regret having allowed the surgeon to take my ovaries when I had my uterus out for endometriosis. I did not wake up expecting to lose my ovaries. I never again want to relive the nightmare I went through those f irst few years of menopause. I wanted to die every day. I lost the person I was before. I unexpectedly developed anorexia nervosa as a means to cope with losing my whole identity and to cope with the severe changes my body went through without ovaries. I went through that for six years and now have severe osteoporosis both from losing my ovaries, years of hormone problems, and the anorexia. I still struggle with my body. I had a wonderful doctor and therapist who both helped me get through it all. It is very very important to have a good support system, to have people around you who get it and understand. Menopause at our age is not a walk in the park, and not natural. Depression is also serious business.
At any rate, to sum it up, I'll bet some kind of prescription hormone replacement would help you. Sometimes a combination of natural progesterone and estradiol really helps women with dry eye sockets. I know there are prescriptions out there just for that problem too. And eating a diet with some nuts and seeds each day, maybe some avocado and coconut, can help with lubrication and dryness too. Do you have a doctor you are working with? What does he/she say and what have they tried for you? Surely fish oil can't be the only solution. If so, like I said, try vegan DHA. It can be hard to find locally (try your local healthfood store if there is one as they might have it) but you can order a three month supply online (or if you just want to "try" it first order a smaller sample). Best wishes to you and just know you are not alone.