how to not seem fanatical around non vegetarians?

[LovelyPerv]

I never really 'came out' as vegan at work...I've only allowed people to think of me as vegetarian.

I don't mention it...and politely turn down the grilled hot dogs...and people have figured it out.

When the subject of grilling steaks and burgers comes up, I'll throw in my own tips...like to add lime juice to the marinade...as it tenderizes the meat.

Before you get horrified...know that this has relaxed everyone...and I'm not seen as 'fanatical' or 'hippie' or 'activist.' I'm their friend...who happens to not eat meat/milk/eggs.

As a result, people around me are 100% comfortable asking me questions about what I eat, what I don't, why not, where do I get (insert nutrient here), and to talk to me about why they would never/could never do it themselves...without worrying that I'll turn into the food police.

Even if you're not being critical, people will feel threatened when faced with a veg*n...and will act as such.

My advice is to chill out, and make it seem as though you could really give a **** what they eat...and you'll get A LOT more questions, and people will me A LOT more willing to hear what you have to say.

[snowbunny11]

Sorry I am too tired to read all the responses, so someone might have already suggested this. Why don't you channel your "fanaticism" into a couple distinct outlets. You mentioned your thesis, so that is a great way for you to express your viewpoints in a very logical, well argued and researched forum. Also, maybe look up some local animal rights groups, or a chapter of PETA (unless you hate them) and get really actively involved. Be passionate, hand out pamphlets, volunteer at a shelter or a community garden, whatever. Try to keep this separate from your personal interactions with friends, family and coworkers. Your beliefs DON'T have to completely define who you are. You are a person who follows a vegetarian diet. Yes, you have reasons for that, and if your friends ask, don't hesitate to let them know. But just don't make it who you are and you won't seem fanatical.

And try to see the good in people. My boyfriend is an omni (grr) but he has recently started volunteering at a rabbit rescue after he rescued a bunny from a very bad friend of his. Now he has three rabbits....

[Cari]

I think in the end you can present your facts, but also respect the choices of others to eat meat. I think thats the big difference, most vegetarians/vegans respect other's choices, but sadly, those that dont are the ones that everyone remembers.

I went to school with a girl who would go around making the animal noise of whatever type of meat was in someone's sandwich, I was embarresed to say that I was a vegan in high school because I didnt want to be associated with her, I didnt want to be known as 'vegan girl' because im more than my diet.
Someone whom you dont know very well standing behind you moo-ing while you eat your lunch is crazy and fanatical, not making people aware of the world around them.

[SomebodyElse]

Someone whom you dont know very well standing behind you moo-ing while you eat your lunch is crazy and fanatical...

Well now I see the people who eat dead animals for lunch as being crazy and fanatical, not the other way around. Though I don't believe that mooing at them is the most effective way to educate them. But I cannot respect people who eat dead sentient beings. Ignorance needs to be corrected, not respected.