hellparadiso
January 15th, 2009, 04:59 PM
My husband comes from a family steeped in meat-eating ritual. They are not mean or rude about my decision to go vege, but they truly, truly don’t understand it. When I try to explain it, they get that glazed-over look…yeah, you know the one I’m talking about.
Anyway, we just moved to a new city to be close to my husband’s parents, a set of grandparents, and a grandmother – that’s five people who simply do not know what to make of my decision. More to the point, however, that’s three women who work very hard to prepare a “tasty” meat-filled meal for everyone when we have a family dinner.
My grandmothers-in-law (both of whom I love dearly, as though they were my own grandmothers) are simply at a total loss. One of them was reduced to tears when I told her that I could eat nothing she had prepared (she made asparagus just for me – it was wrapped in bacon). My mother-in-law (who’s a bit batty) flippantly says, “Oh, I’ll just make a chicken dish for you.” Regardless of how many times I reiterate the definition of vegetarian, she insists every time that she’ll be “happy to throw a chicken breast on the grill with the burgers and dogs.” Even when there is a vegetarian side dish, it’s usually an after thought, and it’s never large enough to accommodate the appetites of everyone, especially if it’s all I’m eating.
This is a tense, agitated, stressed-out Southern family, the members of whom are likely to become not just confused but offended by my choice not to eat animals. I’m terrified.
So here’s my question: Is it more acceptable in such a case to simply eat my vegetarian meal before going to the house and then spend the evening picking at the few meat-free options, or should I continue to try and educate the older women in my family in the ways of feeding me? Either way I think I’m bound to accidentally insinuate that their cooking is not good enough for me, and that kind of insinuation could mean years of hostility. Bringing my own dish is right out, by the way, since it’s been verified that this DOES, in fact, mean that I don’t expect them to provide enough for me.
Anyway, we just moved to a new city to be close to my husband’s parents, a set of grandparents, and a grandmother – that’s five people who simply do not know what to make of my decision. More to the point, however, that’s three women who work very hard to prepare a “tasty” meat-filled meal for everyone when we have a family dinner.
My grandmothers-in-law (both of whom I love dearly, as though they were my own grandmothers) are simply at a total loss. One of them was reduced to tears when I told her that I could eat nothing she had prepared (she made asparagus just for me – it was wrapped in bacon). My mother-in-law (who’s a bit batty) flippantly says, “Oh, I’ll just make a chicken dish for you.” Regardless of how many times I reiterate the definition of vegetarian, she insists every time that she’ll be “happy to throw a chicken breast on the grill with the burgers and dogs.” Even when there is a vegetarian side dish, it’s usually an after thought, and it’s never large enough to accommodate the appetites of everyone, especially if it’s all I’m eating.
This is a tense, agitated, stressed-out Southern family, the members of whom are likely to become not just confused but offended by my choice not to eat animals. I’m terrified.
So here’s my question: Is it more acceptable in such a case to simply eat my vegetarian meal before going to the house and then spend the evening picking at the few meat-free options, or should I continue to try and educate the older women in my family in the ways of feeding me? Either way I think I’m bound to accidentally insinuate that their cooking is not good enough for me, and that kind of insinuation could mean years of hostility. Bringing my own dish is right out, by the way, since it’s been verified that this DOES, in fact, mean that I don’t expect them to provide enough for me.