dear abby [Is it okay to take a 4-year-old hunting?]

[leminchyl]

DEAR ABBY: My 4-year-old grandson, "Teddy," is the apple of my eye. I recently learned that my son-in-law has been taking Teddy hunting for deer and sees no harm in it. At his age, my grandson should be at a petting zoo admiring God's creatures instead of viewing the killing of them. I have a policy of not interfering with my children in their marriages or how they raise their children. However, if needed, I am always available for advice if asked. Although I have shared my opinion that Teddy is too young, it has fallen on deaf ears.

At age 4, my grandson is too immature to understand the killing. I don't believe that this exposure is good for his psychological development at his tender age. How do I approach my son-in-law about this, and at what age do you think it is appropriate to allow the boy to go hunting? -- CONCERNED GRANDPA IN GREENVILLE, S.C.

DEAR GRANDPA: It would be interesting to know how your daughter feels about her son going hunting with his dad. While I am not a fan of killing for sport, many people are avid hunters who consume the birds and animals they shoot. While going on those expeditions at age 4 seems quite young, if your grandson isn't traumatized by the sight of the blood-and-gutting and enjoys the "bonding sessions" with his dad, and his mother has no objection, then I guess he'd old enough to go along -- providing he doesn't get in the way and endanger himself.

[Mr. Sun]

I agree with Abby: "if your grandson isn't traumatized by the sight of the blood-and-gutting and enjoys the "bonding sessions" with his dad, and his mother has no objection, then I guess he'd old enough to go along -- providing he doesn't get in the way and endanger himself."

I would love to see the end of hunting and all animal killings by humans but I don't think that's the point here.

And if Grandpa isn't veg*n, he's a hypocrite. A petting zoo. "Yeah, that's how we treat all the animals".

[Scythe]

Who's Abby? Is this like a literary extension of a talk show or something from a magazine or what?

[denise1021]

Abigail Van Buren was a syndicated advice columnist. She's either very old or dead, but they keep the column going, possibly with her daughter writing it.

Mr. Sun, I totally disagree with you. If the 4-year-old isn't traumatized by the blood and guts, then I'd be pretty worried about him. Also, why attack the Grandpa? Many people simply haven't made the connection between what's on their plates and a live animal.

[Chrysalis]

I think the original Dear Abby died and it is her daughter writing it now. Or maybe I am confusing her with that other advice columnist, Ann Flanders.

I'm not sure if I agree or not with the advice. Perhaps dear abby should have consulted a child psychologist or cited some research findings showing if early exposure to violence is related to a negative mental state...

[denise1021]

Ann Landers was Abigail Van Buren's sister.

[froggythefrog]

I think the original Dear Abby died and it is her daughter writing it now. Or maybe I am confusing her with that other advice columnist, Ann Flanders.

Wife of Ned Flanders?

Psychology is not an exact science, and although they show a strong link between children seeing violence at an early age carrying it out, I think the most that could be done in the length of an Ann Landers or Dear Abby column is arm chair speculation by a qualified psychologist. It'll be interesting to see what kind of responses she gets to this letter since it is a touchy subject.

[Willowriver]

I agree with Mr. Sun. If the kid is a meat eater, this could help him fill the gap that most people have between what's on their plate and actual animals. Of course, I would probably change my tune if I found out these people are just shooting animals and taking the "trophy" parts and wasting the rest. That's an awful lesson for a young child. I think it is very important for people to understand where their food comes from and the suffering that was necessary to get it there. At least then they can start cultivating respect for these creatures. Plus, I think if you're going to eat meat, hunting is probably the most honorable way to go. The animal had a life of its own, wasn't just "that's what it's there for - food," before it died. Plus, I'm sooooooooo sick of those people who say, "Oh, I could never hurt an animal!" before chomping down a whopper. If you don't have the guts to do it yourself, it's morally repugnant to pay someone else to do it!

[Iria]

Abigail Van Buren was a syndicated advice columnist. She's either very old or dead, but they keep the column going, possibly with her daughter writing it.

Mr. Sun, I totally disagree with you. If the 4-year-old isn't traumatized by the blood and guts, then I'd be pretty worried about him. Also, why attack the Grandpa? Many people simply haven't made the connection between what's on their plates and a live animal.

Last I heard, she had dementia and her daughter was writing the column.

[Byzantea]

Dementia :(

[leminchyl]

i dont like the idea of taking a 4-year old hunting. it just doesnt seem right.

[Scythe]

i dont like the idea of taking a 4-year old hunting. it just doesnt seem right.

Then don't.

[LifeDrngWartime]

I don't think a four year old should be taken hunting. Four??? It's bad enough if the kid is out of kidnergarden, at least let them out of preschool. If people have to take jr hunting, wait till they're older kids, I say. A four year old should be watching Big Bird or chasing butterflies. Why can't this prick just take his son for a nice walk in the woods?

[*AHIMSA*]

chasing butterflies. :notvegan:




:D KIDDING.

[gillibean]

Id agree that the kid needs to make the connection between the cute furry animals in the woods and his dinner but taking him hunting in the woods at 4??? I don't see how that could ever been considered safe much less a good idea.

[MRSSHF]

IMO, a parent who exposes his very young male to violence against animals risks causing dysfunction in later life. A recent study has linked media depictions of violence viewed by young boys to aggression later in life. And that's just watching violence on TV or on a video game. Wouldn't real life killing be that much more traumatic?

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/news/20050610/media-violence-may-affect-childrens-minds

[Willowriver]

IMO, a parent who exposes his very young male to violence against animals risks causing dysfunction in later life. A recent study has linked media depictions of violence viewed by young boys to aggression later in life. And that's just watching violence on TV or on a video game. Wouldn't real life killing be that much more traumatic?

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/news/20050610/media-violence-may-affect-childrens-minds

Hmmmm well that's a good point. I don't know how much of a difference it would really make though. The vast majority (though definitely not all) of the hunters I've met are already racist, chauvinist losers. The kid learns violence against humans directly from his dad, usually. It'd be interesting to read a study about the correlation between hunting and violence to humans. Which causes which, I wonder? Or are they both a product of a rural (and hence more likely to be socially conservative and "traditional") culture?

[InstantKarma]

Who's Abby? Is this like a literary extension of a talk show or something from a magazine or what?

Dear Abby (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pauline_Phillips)

[peace]

If the kid is a meat eater, this could help him fill the gap that most people have between what's on their plate and actual animals.
I think it is very important for people to understand where their food comes from and the suffering that was necessary to get it there. At least then they can start cultivating respect for these creatures.

Not necessarily. Very young children are unable to develop nuanced views about responsibility, suffering, and taking a life.

It is my experience that kids who are surrounded by the hunting culture from an early age usually develop a callousness toward animal suffering and the idea that killing animals is a form of play. The kids from the gung-ho hunting families are the same ones using songbirds and cats for target practice and laughing about animals being hurt or killed.

[ripvanfish]

Sigh... That just makes me sad.

[Pixelle]

Too much testosterone. It's a bitch.

[KHADIJAH]

I would never take my child hunting

[ParrotGirl]

My brother got a rifle for his 8th birthday, as grandpa thought he was old enough to go shooting at that age (although my parents have only let him use it since he was 13, after a lot of target practice on milk cartons). He used to go beating since he was about 7 (like a lot of boys do for pocket money) and would tag along with grandpa when he went deer stalking since he was about 9. He also went fox-hunting once, but is not a great rider (his experience is from messing around on my old horse, lessons when he was about 5 and polo which was a craze for about a month), and fell off, embarrasing himself in front of his friends. I dont think a four year old could physically stalk deer at that age. I dont know what deer hunting is like in the US but in britain you walk miles across heather that comes up to your knees up and down steep hills, and ride around on quadbikes over very bumpy ground.

I dont like hunting, but I dont think that it teaches kids to show no compassion for animals. My grandpa loves wildlife and cares a lot about the environment. Yes he kills them, but he is very interested in their lives and behaviour as well. I dont know how you can be like that, but I think a lot of people who hunt develop a love of nature and some have even turned round, realised what they were doing and used their knowledge to help animals.

I think eating game is the best meat. The animals had a natural, wild life (even is they were born in a hatchery) and never had the stress of a slaughterhouse or market. In the case of deer, since man wiped out all their natural predators (in the UK) like wolves they are shot as population control to maintain woodland. It just gets turned into a sick sport along the way.

One of my friends told me that she was made to gut pheasants when she was little, as she had the smallest hands. She is now vegetarian (although eats gelatin and rennet grrr.)

[Scythe]

Dear Abby (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pauline_Phillips)

I stopped caring about this back in February.

[PneumaticJawz78]

Garnering an appreciation of nature is one thing- enjoying or looking down on animals as nothing but good eats is another. I think it depends on the style on which the father teaches him and what kind of example he leads.

If the act of hunting is (ideally) relatively quick and painless for the deer... well, here I go on the fence on hunting again. At least it's local...