Needy Kitty

[paisleyjane]

I decided to take home my mother-in-laws 8 year old cat because she just didnt have time to focus on her. She fed her and petted her and offered a safe environment, but just didnt spend the quality time that we both agreed is important when owning an animal.

I have had her for about a year now, and I have TOTALLY TRANSFORMED HER!! Before she was grumpy, scarce, and really didnt care much for attention. Now, she is the most cuddly, affectionate cat I have ever met!! If I am in the room, she is ON MY LAP - no question. Im not complaining - I love it and I love her!! I love what a close bond we have developed.

The problem is that in the last 3 months or so she has started getting aggressive with cuddling. If I am busy, and cant cuddle (doing work on the comptuer etc) she will just persist and persist until I have to either close the door of the room Im in (where she cries wanting back in) or rearrange what Im doing so I can cuddle at the same time.

The main bad habit that Im worried about (even though it is amazingly cute) is that she has started pawing my face in the middle of the night to wake me up. She paws my face to wake me up, and then meows at me to cuddle her. It is very sweet... but I havent had an uninterrupted sleep in months!! If I sleep with the door closed she just meows and meows endlessly to be let in.

So... any suggestions on breaking this habit? I have tried not cuddling, (as to not positively reinforce the face-pawing) But she is too persistant and its just easier to pet her so I can fall back asleep.

Hmm. I doubt anyone will have a solution, but it is worth a shot!!

[rabid_child]

My cat digs at the covers at night when I'm tucked in. If I lift them up and let them climb under, he'll spoon me and go to sleep under the covers with me. I realize this isn't the ideal solution, but for now we're both happy with it... and the bf doesn't mind him in the bed either! (In fact he's a bit jealous that Munchie wants to sleep on my side and not his)

Does she have enough stuff to do and places of her own to go when you're not available for her? My cats have their own furniture and beds and spots they go to, and have toys and catnip bags they carry around and will entertain themselves if I am busy. A lot of the time they TRY to sit on me, but if I keep pushing them away they're happy to just curl up next to me. Try distracting her with toys, a laser pointer is a good item to get her to run away without you having to do a whole lot.

[paisleyjane]

Hey :)

She has never shown much interest in toys, but if I leave a sweatshirt or hoodie or anything soft that smells like me laying around, she uses it for a bed. I have an old fuzzy sweater that I dont wear anymore and just leave on the couch for her to curl up on. Other than that, not really much of her own space.

I guess it isnt a serious issue, and I dont mind all that much, just thought it would be nice to break the habit, since sometimes she paws with her claws out and it leaves little scratch marks on my lips!! haha.

Thanks for the reply!! I guess I will just keep letting her cuddle, maybe it will go away on its own!!

[michael2]

sounds good the way the cat has gotten over what sounds like ageneral distrust of people with you. try showing her she cant pet your face, brush her paws away whenever she tries, she should soon realise to not do it. maybe if you make some sort of noise to go with brushing her paws away, if she starts pawing your face you could eventually make the noise alone and that could be enough.

[LadyFaile]

i don't let my cat sleep in the bedroom with us or i don't get any sleep. he chews my fingers to get me to pet him. if i take my hands away and put them under the blanket or something he just headbutts me instead. at first he did meow at the door to get in but after a while he learned that it wasn't getting him what he wanted so he stopped. now and then he meows a bit but he gives up quickly or i just say "moo no" and he stops. as long as you respond to her she'll keep doing it. on a weekend when you don't have to be up early try closing the door and let her meow all she wants but don't let her in. eventually she will give up. it would help if she had her own space to sleep in. giving her your clothing just reinforces her habit of having to be near you at all times. letting her have her own bed that smells like her but not you lets her be a little more independent. not all cats like to use petbeds or whatever but if you play with her on her bed she'll get used to it and hopefully use it on her own

as for her interrupting you while you're busy: that's just a cat thing get used to it :p at her age getting another pet may not be wise. you could try socializing her with a friend's pet for a while to see if she is ok with it, if she seems scared or aggressive you might want to pass on that, it just might make her revert to her old grumpy ways or she may get jealous if you give the other animal attention instead of her. because she's so so dependent on you i think it would be trouble. just my opinion

[Libellula]

I agree with LF. We have a blanket that is Maggie's, and a pet bed that only Dorian will use. The cats know they do not get to sleep with us. The first two weeks or so they would miaoux at the door and literally throw themselves into it to get us to come pet them or to let them in, and we didn't give in. Eventually, your cat will stop doing it.

You may want to talk to your vet as well, to see if it's just an attention problem or if it's an anxiety problem. And look into getting toys and spending time every day playing with your cat.

[karenlovessnow]

I have the same problem pretty much...I have four cats...at night Cybil goes in the garage with the kitty condo because she attacks Mandi something fierce. Tommy goes in the basement because he likes the carpeting on the stairs. Thor and Mandi stay upstairs which is torture because they can't be locked out of my room or else they howl and claw and cry at the door. So Thor is in bed with me and Mandi stays on the floor for the most part. She will jump on my head many nights and purr insanely loud in my ear. And Thor is not happy at the foot of the bed so at least 4-5 times during the night he tries to come up to my face...he does the touching the face thing with his paws too. I have poor sleeping patterns as it is so this is making it way worse. I have to come up with something.

[catswym]

i'm surprised that there are cats that DON"T do this! ha. :)

anyway, my situation is like what rabid child described--my cat wakes me about once per night to cuddle up and get a little petting and then we fall back to sleep together. doesn't bug me much as i've never slept thru the night, even when i didn't have the cat.

[leminchyl]

you need to check out the "cat animation" thread under companion animals. funniest thing ever.

[paisleyjane]

Hey thanks for all your advice everyone. Much appreciated.

Leminchyl - thanks for pointing that out --- I laughed so HARD!! It is SO TRUE :)

[KellyFlower]

My cat has a cat blanket as well, and also 2 shoe boxes, one in the living room and one in my computer room floor where she will smush herself into the boxes, lol, but try a comfy fleece type blanket, sometimes my cat will try to wake us up in the middle of the night as well b/c she is hungry, we have started feeding her "dinner" later at night which seems to help. Good luck!

[rabid_child]

My cat has a cat blanket as well, and also 2 shoe boxes, one in the living room and one in my computer room floor where she will smush herself into the boxes, lol, but try a comfy fleece type blanket, sometimes my cat will try to wake us up in the middle of the night as well b/c she is hungry, we have started feeding her "dinner" later at night which seems to help. Good luck!

Mine get "snack" before bed because they will wake us up all night for food if we don't. Really what we do is split up their dinner into two meals and give them half at dinner time and half before bed. They're much happier that way.

[Libellula]

ours are still kittens so the bowls get to stay full until mayish of next year. They eat when they're hungry and then stop.