zoebird
December 14th, 2006, 03:21 PM
October J would like to share his routine for optimal fitness. This includes exercise, diet, and lifestyle practices. :bobo:
Exercise
Have someone create an obstacle course for you by putting laundry into folded and unfolded piles about the living room.
then, beginning at once side of the living room, run in a circle under the sofa, the side tables, and over the various sized piles of laundry. avoid going under the chair and coffee table.
after two loops in here, do zig zag and kick up your heels as you cross the entry area to get to the dining room. do a weaving run between the chair and table legs. repeat this around and around the table for at least 2 minutes.
zig zag and dance back into the living room. if possible, pee on a clean pile of laundry which will make someone chase you around the room. this increases the motivation for speed. After being chased for a few mintues, Sit down and bathe yourself as if nothing is happening.
then, zip up the stairs as fast as you can, first running along the outter wall, and when the stairs turn the corner, run along the inner wall. When you get to the top of the stairs, run into the bathroom and box the toilet paper roll until much of the toilet paper is off the roll. grab the end of it, and go dancing out of the bathroom and run into the bedroom. hold on to the paper for as long as you can, while running in circles around the room, first clockwise, then counter clockwise--at least three times each direction.
quickly race out of the room letting go of the paper. dash across the hall into your own room and go in the litter box. recieve a compliment for doing so. leave the box with a bit of disdain and flicking of your feet as you run behind your favorite chair and spend a few minutes washing your face and ears.
Thump twice before setting off again--running down the hall, down the stairs, through the foyer (dancing), and running into the bathroom downstairs (powder room) to box with the toilet paper in there. if possible, steal one of the toilet paper cores from the trash can and toss it into the foyer area. dance around like you haven't a care in the world, toss the toilet paper roll around the room a bit.
then, pretend that you're bored, go under the dining room chair where someone is typing on the computer, lay down and take a nap.
Do this daily, 2-3 times a day if possible. The whole indoor routine takes about 30 minutes.
Diet
simply adopt a raw, vegan diet. eat poo because it has b12. you need only eat one or two small, specialty poops that your body makes once or twice a day to recieve adequate nutrition. the optimal combination is this:
timothy hay--unlimited amounts
various greens--lots
high-fiber pellets--about 1/2 cup per day
goji berries (dried)--about 5 per day
poop--2-6 per day
occassionally, give yourself a treat of a small carrot, a few bites of an apple (no more than three so that you don't get the runs), and occassionally steal pizza if no one is looking.
Lilfestyle
your lifestyle has to be in balance. Mine is balanced out into five categories: sex, food, exercise, projects (including meditation), and sleep. Each of these must be balanced to your perfect combination. strive to have sex at least 3 times a day, and if you can get more, then do. Sex is very good for the body and heck, you feel good. And, it only takes about 10 seconds.
as soon as you finish any of the other things on your list (sex, food, exercise, projects), then you need to bathe and sleep for at least 30 minutes right away. this is key for having optimal healing and optimal energy levels.
I hope that you get optimal health from this regime!
Sincerely,
october j.
Exercise
Have someone create an obstacle course for you by putting laundry into folded and unfolded piles about the living room.
then, beginning at once side of the living room, run in a circle under the sofa, the side tables, and over the various sized piles of laundry. avoid going under the chair and coffee table.
after two loops in here, do zig zag and kick up your heels as you cross the entry area to get to the dining room. do a weaving run between the chair and table legs. repeat this around and around the table for at least 2 minutes.
zig zag and dance back into the living room. if possible, pee on a clean pile of laundry which will make someone chase you around the room. this increases the motivation for speed. After being chased for a few mintues, Sit down and bathe yourself as if nothing is happening.
then, zip up the stairs as fast as you can, first running along the outter wall, and when the stairs turn the corner, run along the inner wall. When you get to the top of the stairs, run into the bathroom and box the toilet paper roll until much of the toilet paper is off the roll. grab the end of it, and go dancing out of the bathroom and run into the bedroom. hold on to the paper for as long as you can, while running in circles around the room, first clockwise, then counter clockwise--at least three times each direction.
quickly race out of the room letting go of the paper. dash across the hall into your own room and go in the litter box. recieve a compliment for doing so. leave the box with a bit of disdain and flicking of your feet as you run behind your favorite chair and spend a few minutes washing your face and ears.
Thump twice before setting off again--running down the hall, down the stairs, through the foyer (dancing), and running into the bathroom downstairs (powder room) to box with the toilet paper in there. if possible, steal one of the toilet paper cores from the trash can and toss it into the foyer area. dance around like you haven't a care in the world, toss the toilet paper roll around the room a bit.
then, pretend that you're bored, go under the dining room chair where someone is typing on the computer, lay down and take a nap.
Do this daily, 2-3 times a day if possible. The whole indoor routine takes about 30 minutes.
Diet
simply adopt a raw, vegan diet. eat poo because it has b12. you need only eat one or two small, specialty poops that your body makes once or twice a day to recieve adequate nutrition. the optimal combination is this:
timothy hay--unlimited amounts
various greens--lots
high-fiber pellets--about 1/2 cup per day
goji berries (dried)--about 5 per day
poop--2-6 per day
occassionally, give yourself a treat of a small carrot, a few bites of an apple (no more than three so that you don't get the runs), and occassionally steal pizza if no one is looking.
Lilfestyle
your lifestyle has to be in balance. Mine is balanced out into five categories: sex, food, exercise, projects (including meditation), and sleep. Each of these must be balanced to your perfect combination. strive to have sex at least 3 times a day, and if you can get more, then do. Sex is very good for the body and heck, you feel good. And, it only takes about 10 seconds.
as soon as you finish any of the other things on your list (sex, food, exercise, projects), then you need to bathe and sleep for at least 30 minutes right away. this is key for having optimal healing and optimal energy levels.
I hope that you get optimal health from this regime!
Sincerely,
october j.