my mom has favored my brother my whole life, because our births were really close she always thought she didnt pay enough attention to him, and i've been paying for that forever.

for example:

for christmas when i was 13 i wanted a guitar, thats all i got for christmas because that was all i wanted, my brother kept taking it out of my room, and once i went to ask for it back and my mom told me to 'stop being such a bitch, because i never use it anyway' so i just let it go because i was so mad about it, my brother moved to pheonix with my other brother & when he came back the guitar was tottaly trashed, he said he was going to fix it but never did, he still has it, and he broke the amp i got with it too.

now on to whats going on now. ive had this really cheap phone for like a year, my mom got the same kind of phone and it only lasted for 2 MONTHS until she had to get a new one. my phone is broken now (it cracks during calls so bad you cant hear anything) my birthday is in like 9 days, and of course people are going to call. but its broken.

so today I asked my mom to go to her mobile provider site, and apparently the 'cheaper phones' (discount) wont work until feburary, my birthday is on the 4th, theres no way i would be able to get one in time for my birthday. so naturally i was dissopointed. then as im sitting there my mom starts adding up my bill(which i was aware i went over this month, she's been bugging me forever, i gave her like 20 dollars and i've been cleaning up the house like every day for like 2 weeks to make up for it). i already KNOW how much the bill is, but she sits there and adds it up and says "LOOK AT THIS, LOOK AT THIS NUMBER, THIS IS WHAT YOURE GETTING FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY."

then a few minutes later my brother walks in to ask for 20 bucks and she just gives it to him without even thinking about it, my brother had a job, he was supposed to be paying rent but he never did, now he quit his job & hes been bumming money off my mom for fast food and games and stuff, even though if i ask her to get something from the store she starts this big arguement about how theres enough food in the house! even though my brother gets fast food like 8 times a day. then every weekend he goes to another town to his friends house there, every WEEK he asks my mom for 40 bucks for gas, my dad has been telling her not to but she doesnt listen to him, yet anytime my dad says something bad about me she screams and yells until she doesnt have anything to say anymore, then gives me a bunch of stuff to do to 'make up for it' so in the light of my brother getting 40 bucks a week plus like 10 bucks a day for fast food & 20 bucks during the week anytime he wants to buy a game. my 70 dollar phone bill doesnt seem that bad.

but not to my mother, she's been bitching me out about it like every day for like 3 weeks, even though ive been trying to make up for it.

i just dont know what to do anymore. im not talking to her.

Oh this makes me feel really sad. :hug:

I'm pretty sure your Mum probably doesn't realise how differently she is treating the two of you and has just developed some bad habits. She probably doesn't ever register that she's just told you off about money then gives your brother some.

Can you ask to sit and have a chat with her and explain it makes you feel hurt that she treats the two of you of differently. That you understand a $70 phone bill is very high and you are prepared to help out to pay for it (with extra jobs) but your hurt that your brotehr gets equal money and doesn't work for it?

I understand exactly how you feel, my mom has pretty much ruined my sister by babying "her little girl" she agrees that that is a big part of what is wrong with Sydney, but insists that "this time" Sydney really needs the money/help/ride, etc. She has also blamed me for Sydney's problems, apparently when we were little I was mean to her, and that, not the fact that my parents are both psycho, is what caused Sydney to be like she is.

I'm personally glad that my mother never treated me like that because as a result, I'm not 18 with a baby by a 33 year old man willing to steal from me, am able to hold down a non-****ty job, have friend's that aren't trash, etc. However, it infuriates me to watch my parents interact with my sister and continue to walk down the same paths and make the same mistakes over and over again.

I really don't have any advice, just my own rant, I gave up and moved to another city, which is working pretty well, but I don't think you need to do anything quite that drastic.

You don't see it now, but some day you will realize that by not being enabled you will grow up to be a strong, self-sufficient person. However your sibling may never be able to care for themselves. One of these days you'll look back and remember what I am telling you.

Trust me, I know from experience....I could tell you some stories you wouldn't believe.

Forgive your Mom, she doesn't realize what she is doing and doesn't know any better. Oh...and watch that phone bill.

Hugs to you...I gets better Hun.

after talking to my boyfriend and lots of comfort food later, im feeling lots better. its just a matter of time before it happens agian but i might as well enjoy my happy moments. its just a matter of time too before she goes too far and i end up crying in front of her and she spend a while day trying to buy my love back, it's a pathetic twisted circle. but eh.

Super hugs. :hug: That sounds so frustrating.

Unfortunetly I had a grandmother who was horrbiel to most of her children (she had 6) except the youngest. You'd think after years it might change, but it hasn't. After years and years of abuse, my mother finally had to cut off all ties with her own mother- it's sad, but like I actually said to her the other day "just because she's blood doesn't make her a good person".. It sounds like you live with her, so that's pretty hard, but remember you are a great person and it's her own loss for not seeing that in you. I hope that your relationship doesn't get to the point of my mothers and her mom, but remember you put yourself and your feelings first.

PS: Which phone company are you using? I have a motorola cell I never use. PM me and let me know :)

Oh, good idea delic Grape, I've got two phones, one I know is for sun com, and the other is I think for US cellular, but I'll have to check, my b/f's mom kept giving phones when she switched companies so I would be able to call 911 if my car broke down somewhere before I got my own phone activated.

i think i have an old sprint and an old cingular phone floating around somewhere too.

It must be so frustrating having your mum be so unreasonable to you, compared with your brother.. ive been in that situation a couple of time and yeah couldnt imagine putting up with that all the time.

There isnt really much you can do, because if you try get her to see how unreasonable it is.. it'll most likely end in an arguement.. and yeah as you're the child.. you'll probably get in trouble for it.

Anyway big hugs to you ay.. just remember.. it wont last much longer anyway!