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squished
10-05-05, 01:20 AM
My grandmother passed away last night. She had always been a very strong woman, survived numerous strokes and an aortic aneurysm. She had been in the hospital lately, first for dehydration, then a TIA (small stroke) that temporarily paralyzed her legs. The doctors think either a new aneurysm burst or her heart just stopped. She was 89 years old.

For the past few years I had been my grandma's primary caregiver. I took her to all her doctor appointments, shopping, errands, church, anywhere she needed. My grandmother and I were very close. I scheduled my classes so I could visit her throughout the day. She and I were always on the phone. I just don't know what to do without her.

Thanks for letting me vent.

VeganArtist
10-05-05, 01:43 AM
Sweetie I am so so sorry... I know that you will miss her so much. I believe that she is still with you. She will always be a part of you. Not only because you spent so much time with her, but because she is your grandma. You probably have or may someday have some of her characteristics in life. Grandma's are so wonderful. I miss mine. Something that kind of helped me when my grandma passed away was my mom telling me that I was like her in a lot of ways. Then, whenever I find myself doing those things that she would do, it reminds me of her. Just know that we are here for you when you need us. *hugs*

Amy SF
10-05-05, 01:49 AM
I'm sorry you lost your grandma. :hug: I lost my grandmother in 1988 and I still miss her. It's hard when you lose a loved one; go ahead and cry if you need to.

I think it's great that the two of you were so close. :)

Skylark
10-05-05, 01:57 AM
So sorry to hear you lost someone important to you. :hug: Something that helps some grieving people is making a journal or scrapbook where they write down all their important memories of their loved one. Then you don't have to worry that you'll forget something special and lose it forever.

carrot
10-05-05, 11:55 AM
Aww I really feel for you. This is time when you will need to lean on family. I'm sending some hugs x

Thalia
10-05-05, 12:24 PM
I'm very sorry to hear this. You did a great thing by taking care of her. Of course many of us feel like, how could you not do this for a loved one? Well there are a lot of elderly out there with no family who'll look after their well being or who have all moved far, far away. I'm sure she appreciated the love you showed her.

rainbow_clouds
10-05-05, 12:28 PM
:hug: I'm sorry.

squished
10-05-05, 01:07 PM
Thanks everyone. I've never lost anybody other than my brother to cancer in 1999. I just can't believe she's not here anymore. I was picking up supplies yesterday and when I had finished shopping, I realized I had only picked up items she liked. Later I was driving home and I automatically hit her number on speed dial to tell her I'd be by. She's just been the focus of my life for so long, that's what's hard. We had always promised not to put her in a home, so that's why I took care of her.

Yeah, I have a lot of my grandma's characteristics, mainly her stubbornness! We also used to joke around about crazy stuff. My mom calls us the "silly buddies." We're just waiting for my uncle to come in from Denver to help with arrangements. It feels like being in limbo-just waiting.

scottishveggy
10-05-05, 04:09 PM
So sorry to hear of your loss *hugs*

Thalia
10-05-05, 04:24 PM
Yeah, I have a lot of my grandma's characteristics, mainly her stubbornness! We also used to joke around about crazy stuff.
I have found one of the best ways to remember some one is to try to keep in mind how they've influenced you, and notice the characteristics in yourself they passed on to you. It's comforting to know that little bits of them are living on in yourself and others.

squished
10-05-05, 05:49 PM
So sorry to hear you lost someone important to you. :hug: Something that helps some grieving people is making a journal or scrapbook where they write down all their important memories of their loved one. Then you don't have to worry that you'll forget something special and lose it forever.

This is such a good idea! (Thank you sweetie).
I've been going through some of her things :sick: but I did find clippings of her marriage to grampa and his obituary (grampa died in 1952-she never remarried!). I'm scanning some things, and then I'm going to make a collage of happy pics and clippings to set up at the family gathering. It will help displace the images of seeing her at the hospital after she passed.

squished
10-05-05, 05:52 PM
I have found one of the best ways to remember some one is to try to keep in mind how they've influenced you, and notice the characteristics in yourself they passed on to you. It's comforting to know that little bits of them are living on in yourself and others.

True. Ok, I guess her stubbornness, independence, and her example are helping me get through this.

And you all are, too. I really appreciate it. Recently, some of us posted what VB means to us, right now you all are a wonderful support and comfort. I also mentioned to my family all of your kind words. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. :angel:

Bits
10-10-05, 04:57 PM
you're so lucky that you and your grandma had such a close relationship,i'm sure you've got loads of great memories that nobody can ever take from you.i wish me and my nan got on. i'm really sorry for your loss.