Hey. I am 19 years old and I have only ever been in one serious relationship before if you can even call it serious. We were together 1 month. The thing is I have never really felt the desire to be in a relationship before. I never been in love before and i never really care if i have a boyfriend or not. I only ever wanted one because everyone else does. I feel like i cant fall in love for some reason maybe because i focus too much on myself. I dont really think about anyone else. I dont know if this is okay or not. I mean i want to live a life like everyone else. Should I at this point be looking for a guy or not? I am 19 years old and after college should be getting married or something and I really havent given it much thought and all. My past relationships were only for sex and it was all i really wanted no matter how nice they were to me. I dont know if i should think about finding a true love or just focus on my studies. I never really have feelings like that for anyone.

:/

what do you guys think i should do?

i don't think you should be thinking about it. i do believe everyone falls in love. but you're still young, your turn will come when you least expect it...so don't look for it!! just focus on your studies, live your life, have fun for now.

I am 19 years old and after college should be getting married or something and I really havent given it much thought and all.

Now's the time to give that thought, then. The good news is that you don't have to get married. No one has to get married, no one has to be in a relationship. You can go into a career, travel, volunteer in third world countries, anything you want to. I'm married, myself, but I'm jealous of my 21-year-old single sister who just graduated University and is now going to travel Europe and work for a year.

Actually, being 19 and not in a relationship is perfectly normal. Some people find their true love young. Some find them in their 40s. Some don't find them at all, and that's fine. The best thing to do is find out what you want to do, who you are, and what you need to do to feel comfortable and happy.

Most people fall in love "by accident", anyway. The best way to find love is to not look for it.

Don't worry if you don't want a relationship right now. That's fine. You don't have to worry so much about what society deems as 'normal'. Normal is wherever you are at the moment. I think eventually you'll find love, but if you don't then that's fine too. You sound perfectly okay to me. You don't have to live a life like everyone else's. Live your own life and then you can be truly happy, in love or not.

I've found that anytime I was single and was trying too hard to meet someone, i.e. blind dates, clubs, etc. , that I never met anyone. When I wasn't trying is when I found the person I love the most. I would just relax and someone will come along eventually. When it's the real thing, you will *just know* that it's right.

I am 19 years old and after college should be getting married or something and I really havent given it much thought and all. My past relationships were only for sex and it was all i really wanted no matter how nice they were to me.
Why "should" you be getting married after college? Don't get me wrong, marriage is very much a pillar of human culture, but you ought to consider it a result of love, not of effort or will, and there is no timeframe for love. As for relationships for the sake of sex, which is no relationship at all - just sex for the sake of sex, that's a moral issue that you have to deal with on your own.

the only possible answer to a question that starts "does everyone..?" is "no."

maybe you're already inlove ......
...

.... with yourself ;)

the only possible answer to a question that starts "does everyone..?" is "no."

So some people live forever right?

So some people live forever right?

I haven't died yet, and it's been 17 years, so judging by those patterns I think I will live forever. ;)


Anyway, about love...

Loving yourself is great. Relationships bring a whole new level of drama to your life. There's nothing wrong with living by yourself, for yourself for as long as you want. Enjoy life and be your own person and the rest will fall into place. You don't HAVE to do anything.

the only possible answer to a question that starts "does everyone..?" is "no."
For example, does everybody read questions so literally as KJS? Thank goodness the answer to that one is no, too. :cool:

Actually, being 19 and not in a relationship is perfectly normal. Some people find their true love young. Some find them in their 40s. Some don't find them at all, and that's fine. The best thing to do is find out what you want to do, who you are, and what you need to do to feel comfortable and happy.

Most people fall in love "by accident", anyway. The best way to find love is to not look for it.

:hamster: :hamster: Here's to finding true love (in your 40's even) when you weren't even looking for it! :hamster: :hamster:

"Love" isn't what it looks like in the movies. Its about two people wanting the same thing - a healthy and happy relationship that works.

You're still SOOO young - most young relationships are just practice for the ones you'll have later in life, so don't worry if you aren't busy at "practice" just yet - you have a lot of time. My best friend is getting married in two months and didn't meet her love until her mid twenties. Another friend of mine is in her 30s, and is trying so desperately to find a man to take care of her that no one will touch her with a 10 foot pole. Her experience tells an excellent lesson : if you are looking to find someone to "make you whole", you wont find it... you need to BE whole to give a part of yourself to the person you'll love, too.

Just be yourself, and be happy with who you are. The rest will fall into place eventually. :-)

For example, does everybody read questions so literally as KJS? Thank goodness the answer to that one is no, too. :cool:

But why did you read my answer so literally? :devil:

you're young. do what you feel you need to do.

i don't believe in many 'shoulds' in life. there really aren't any. there's no requirement that you 'should' do or be anything. There is really only what you need and what you want. You figure that out, you'll be way ahead.

i say if you are truly happy then **** it.

But why did you read my answer so literally? :devil:
Well parried! Well parried, indeed.