Food Issues Food Log

[Libellula]

i'm not having a good day. my throat hurts.... i have HIVES.. god i hate being sick, and since i have no appetite today, i'm gonna post here..

B: Bran Flakes mixed w/multigrain O's in plain silk (i realized yesterday that I don't like the texture of full-fat soymilk..), coffee w/sweet n low, purple popsicle, raspberry fruit2O
L:whole soy peach yogurt w/fruit and crunchy cereal, toast, red popsicle, more fruit2O
D: vegan sushi.

[porvida]

I couldn't sleep this morning, so now it's almost 11 and I've been up for like 6 hours. oh well. so far I've just eaten:
some crenshaw melon (DROOL)
a little dry cereal

im gonna have a couple bites of leftover pasta puttanesca (obviously minus the anchovies) plus a lot more ice water and then I'm gonna go work out. i'm going ot start going to the gym. honest. i need it.

[Amy323]

b: oatmeal with walnuts, flax and banana
S: carrots and a slice of cheese
L: falafel, tabouli, sugar-free fudgesicle
S: cantaloupe and blueberries
D: mustard greens sauteed with garlic and white beans, sweet potato with margarine and cinnamon
S: banana chocolate chip muffin, chocolate milk

Ok, so I went to fitday.com and entered everything and I only about 1700 calories today (and this is an average day for me) and apparently, I should be getting about 2000 calories for my height/weight in order to loss weight. I'm eating even less and not losing weight though. I read somewhere that if you eat to little your body will think you're starving and hold onto everything and, thus you won't loss weight. Is there anyway thats what's happening to me? I'm not that much under 2000 and I'm not hungry, so I don't feel like I need to eat more. Any ideas???

[CharityAJO]

It's also good to eat *often* for weight loss, which you are doing. (Helps to offset that 'starvation' mode). I don't know, chin up. :)

[porvida]

b/l: (at noon) egg whites scrambled with lots of veg....well it looked like a lot but it wasnt that much I guess. onion, zuchinni, broccoli, little cauliflower. small scoop of homemade breakfast potatoes, ketchup. ice water and a cup of black tea.

im gonna go to the gym soon, and I think I'll do a lot better today since I ate something with protein! ya.

[Amy323]

Ohh there's my post! I thought I had posted in the "I Ate Today Thread"

Ok, so ya think I need to work on getting more calories? Even if I'm not hungry? I am thinking about adding more fat (good fats!). More nuts, avocado and oil. Sounds like a good plan?

[porvida]

b/l: (at noon) egg whites scrambled with lots of veg....well it looked like a lot but it wasnt that much I guess. onion, zuchinni, broccoli, little cauliflower. small scoop of homemade breakfast potatoes, ketchup. ice water and a cup of black tea.

im gonna go to the gym soon, and I think I'll do a lot better today since I ate something with protein! ya.


after the gym my blood sugar totally plummeted and I ate a tiiiny plum and 1/2 a small grapefruit...mmmmm.
i guess sushi later.

[Virtue23]

Ok, so yesterday all I really had was 2 nectarines and a small bag of craisins. I did a partial fast, so I forgive myself. :)

But today.... Too. Many. Carbs.

TODAY:
B: cinnamon oatmeal packet, 1C apple juice
B2: we hosted a brekkie at work and had TONS of food, soo...I had 1/2 choc. muffin, most of a small cherry pastry, and 1/4 multigrain bagel with a bit of all-natural fruit preserves. :-P (oh for SHAME. Is that like a binge???)
L: planned: usual ww sandwich wrap, 1 nectarine, low-fat granola bar (small), water!!
s: 2 more small lf gran. bars
D: a little bit of my black bean and brown rice casserole

The scary thing is I don't actually feel that full. Eek. I just feel satisfied or whatever, even tho I usually don't eat nearly as much. sooo weird man.

[CountessKerouac]

B2: we hosted a brekkie at work and had TONS of food, soo...I had 1/2 choc. muffin, most of a small cherry pastry, and 1/4 multigrain bagel with a bit of all-natural fruit preserves. :-P (oh for SHAME. Is that like a binge???)


Are you kidding me? Of course that isn't a binge. A binge is when you cannot stop eating...when you eat like thousands of calories in one sitting. Or something similar to that. What you did was eat normally.

[Virtue23]

Well, it was certainly more carbs than I'm used to eating all at once... in a LONG time so it was weird and I felt a tad bit guilty. But I guess you're right - it wasn't a binge exactly. But still no good. I wasn't "hungry" for that extra cherry pastry and 1/2 a chocolate muffin (of all things) - I just ate it because it was there. :-P Oh well. One day won't kill me.

[porvida]

so yesterday sucked.
i ate:

1/2 a packet of pop rocks (haha...15 cal)
the innards of a grilled veggie burrito
and a couple tiny bites of cheesecake and a couple cashews

diet coke, iced tea with sweet n low, water, black coffee.

oops. i slept half the day and was out shopping and crap. I guess one day won't kill me. I've been eating somewhat better, if I'm hungry I'll eat and I don't feel too guilty about it anymore. I still watch what i eat and will not take in too many cals or fat in one sitting, but thats good, right? I've been working out and eating a lot of fruit/veg.

[bunnyhugger<3]

Hey guys. I've really been having a hard time with food lately. I ahve gained 15 lbs in the past four months and have struggled with both bulimia and anorexia in the past. I want to be thin again, and am struggling to avoid hurting myself in the process. I'm hoping for the support of you guys.
Today is indicative of the destructive behavior of the last few months:
B: biscuit,egg
l: lightlife smart bbq "pork" and 15 terra chips
s: 9 fat free cappincino brownies (haha)
d:spinach,cheese, onion rice with chik'n
s: choc mousse
I feel gross!!:(

[misq17]

Hey guys. I've really been having a hard time with food lately. I ahve gained 15 lbs in the past four months and have struggled with both bulimia and anorexia in the past. I want to be thin again, and am struggling to avoid hurting myself in the process. I'm hoping for the support of you guys.
Today is indicative of the destructive behavior of the last few months:
B: biscuit,egg
l: lightlife smart bbq "pork" and 15 terra chips
s: 9 fat free cappincino brownies (haha)
d:spinach,cheese, onion rice with chik'n
s: choc mousse
I feel gross!!:(
Hey, that's not so bad. You might want to try and get in some more fruits and veggies. We all have our days when we eat tons of cookies or brownies or something, you just have to get over it and tell yourself you'll do better tomorrow :hug:

Today:
B: 2 bowls Crispix with Silk

L: Toasted everything bagel
a few salt free pretzels
a carrot
about 5 or 6 frozen strawberries

D: 2 HIAV spicy black bean burgers
pita bread
a pickle
5 pieces of asparagus
2 pieces of broccoli
1 chocolate chip PB cookie

S: A couple spoonfuls of lentil mixture from the lentil moussaka that I made for tomorrow

I wish there was good fruit that I could get in the fall/winter other than frozen/dried fruit and apples in the fall.

[Virtue23]

I will post here today since I seem to be unintentionally annoying some people in the other thread. :-P

Today:

L/D: cinnamon raisin bagel w/ pb (from Einsteins)
s: 2 apple cinn. rice cakes

I also had 1 small choc. covered pretzel from a bag of them that my boss bought for us. Hmmm...I want some chai tea I think. Lets hope tomorrow will be much better on the veggie/fruit front. :up:

[porvida]

virtue- you're not annoying us, its just that its REALLY eating-disordered (NOT saying you have one, but many times you look as if you're on the track to one...and you dont eat enough to function many days. or what you should eat at least) to say 'omg i ate less than like 1/4 bagel i feel so gross'...i mean come on. thats LESS than 50 calories. if you feel gross or guilty after an extra 50 calories, you have issues.

that said.
i couldnt sleep today, because i fell asleep really early last night. i've been up for like 5 hours. i ate:
a mango with chilli powder
a couple cashews
diet lemonade and like 5 wheat thins with homemade hummus and little strips of roasted red pepper.

im hungry, i really am, and i want to eat something. but we have like ZERO good food in the house right now, i really know i need some protein but nothing sounds good. also my boyfriends been asleep this whole time and Im kinda waiting for him to wake up, i dont like eating when someone's not eating with me, or at least at the same time :-/ maybe we'll go get some food. ya know. before he leaves for good tonight :(

I promised myself last night: NO. MORE. PURGING. I want to stick with it and I'm terrified I'm going to get REALLY bad once he leaves but I'm going to do all I can to not sink back into a hole and get really sick and depressed like I did at the beginning of the year. it freaks me out to even think about it. so im trying.

[porvida]

virtue- you're not annoying us, its just that its REALLY eating-disordered (NOT saying you have one, but many times you look as if you're on the track to one...and you dont eat enough to function many days. or what you should eat at least) to say 'omg i ate less than like 1/4 bagel i feel so gross'...i mean come on. thats LESS than 50 calories. if you feel gross or guilty after an extra 50 calories, you have issues.

that said.
i couldnt sleep today, because i fell asleep really early last night. i've been up for like 5 hours. i ate:
a mango with chilli powder
a couple cashews
diet lemonade and like 5 wheat thins with homemade hummus and little strips of roasted red pepper.

im hungry, i really am, and i want to eat something. but we have like ZERO good food in the house right now, i really know i need some protein but nothing sounds good. also my boyfriends been asleep this whole time and Im kinda waiting for him to wake up, i dont like eating when someone's not eating with me, or at least at the same time :-/ maybe we'll go get some food. ya know. before he leaves for good tonight :(

I promised myself last night: NO. MORE. PURGING. I want to stick with it and I'm terrified I'm going to get REALLY bad once he leaves but I'm going to do all I can to not sink back into a hole and get really sick and depressed like I did at the beginning of the year. it freaks me out to even think about it. so im trying.

[Virtue23]

I get it porvida. And since I knew it wasn't a "rational" feeling I should have just not posted it. I know its ridiculous "to feel gross" from eating an extra small piece of a bagel, but for some reason, I physically did. Like my jeans felt kinda tight all of sudden which I could only blame the extra carbs for, even tho yeah, that is kinda ridiculous. But nuff said - I just won't post irrational feelings like that. Cause they are... well, irrational.

Anyway - make sure you take care of yourself too. Don't wait for your bf to get up. Eat something now so you'll be fresh and non-food-deprived when he does awake. :)
Seriously take care... and eat! ::hug:

[Libellula]

virtue, we aren't annoyed with you, we're just worried. you say you aren't suffering with an ED, but your posts indicate otherwise. if they were few and far between, it would be a different story, but it seems like every day you're struggling with eating enough. I worry about you dear, i want to see you continue to be able to dance and act for years and years and years to come.

[Virtue23]

No need to worry. I get enough calories every day usually. Even if it means snacking on sunflower seeds and rice cakes after dinner :D. True, I don't count calories to make sure but I stay in tune with my body (or basucally, I eat when hungry and sometimes when I'm not hungry :-P).

Oh, and I don't act actually, lol. But I do dance and I also do some local/ "not-really-a-big-deal" modeling. Ha! In fact, my first ever photo shoot (for a hair magazine, I think) is this Sunday.

[ynaffit]

i'm feeling depressed, so i don't expect to eat very well today. i don't care enough to try.

morning: tj raisin bran with almond milk, a banana
afternoon: tablespoon of protein powder, orange juice, 4 squares of chocolate, handful of pumpkin seeds
night: about half of the semi-seitanic substance i created, guac & chips

[Libellula]

i only worry about you virtue because i care :)

i don't have a big appetite, either, and many of my friends think that i choose to eat so little, when my body just can't handle big meals... so i understand where you're coming from..

[ursa]

I realize none of you know me, I'm still a newbie here and I hope no one resents my butting in, but I just feel I have to say something. I have been reading this thread for awhile - almost compulsively, because people's posts here often seem like a piece of the script that's been playing in my own head for half my life. I admit that I've struggled with an ED for over ten years and am still struggling.

I just want to say to everyone here: please, please be kind to yourselves. It's OK to enjoy eating, even to eat when you're not physically hungry at all! It's ok to eat just because the food is there and looks and tastes good - most people do this frequently without feeling the slightest bit guilty.

Several books by Geneen Roth have helped me - not all the time, but sometimes - to feel less anguish about eating. She is an exceptionally perceptive and sensitive writer and I would recommend her to anyone who is battling these demons.

slinking back to the shadows now...

[Libellula]

welcome ursa!! :vebo: your input is always welcome!

[CountessKerouac]

Virtue, you weren't annoying me either! I care about you and want you to be a strong, healthy, sexy model! :D I don't want to see you develop an ED because that would make me so sad. You seem like such an awesome person! God would not want you to hurt your body, but instead to love it and take good care of it. :yes:

[Virtue23]

awww thanks CK and everyone else that said I was not annoying them, lol! I always try to do my best. :D

And on a side note, CK - I duly expect more details on said "date" in the relationship thread or wherever. ha ha.