Today I got told "You seem a little chubby for a vegetarian, I mean don't get me wrong-you look fine, I just always thought of vegetarians as being thin". I have no idea what was to be implied or gained by that statement. All I could do was turn bright red and say "I feel good at the size I am." At which point I was told I needed to "lighten up" because he's just messing around with me. Right, and that makes it not hurt. I haven't had anyone mention my size in a long time and the familiar feelings are coming back...so yeah, I'm about 5-10 lbs overweight and I feel good...I don't understand why that comment was felt necessary or appropriate. I've just recently started to love my body for every curve and stretch mark I posess and I don't want an ignorant comment like that to set me back...what a jerk.

And we really need to squash that evil rumor that all veg*ns are twigs!! Less likely to be overweight or obese sure but not void of all fat.

Don't let a comment set you back. I'm sure the person didn't know better, and didn't mean to offend you. Just take it as a slip-up, and move on.

Aww...just chalk it up to a jerk being a jerk. They are all over the place, you'll eventually run into one. Don't allow the comments of the ignorant set you back. I'm sure this person has something about themselves that they are insecure about. Sometimes it bugs people that I'm bigger but yet confident and sexy. They don't understand how that can be. You must be confusing this person too.

<~~agrees with Ruthie.

I've just recently started to love my body for every curve and stretch mark I posess and I don't want an ignorant comment like that to set me back

i agree that people shouldn't assume veg*ns are "thin" but we (us big girls of the world) need to re-write our attitudes about what is a compliment or not. what he meant as not a compliment we can take as one.

you're starting to love your body which is an AWESOME awesome thing! so you're "chubby", isn't that the same as saying you're curvy? you're not a stick, you're a woman with hips and thighs and stretchmarks to show you're real and you're not afraid to take up space. good for you! take up space, be large, be thankful you're healthy and not starving. your body is built for comfort, so be comfortable. :lovesign:

i am fat. i am very very (morbidly) obese. i am so obese that i get names and opinions shouted at me from across malls and bus stations by people i have never even met on a regular basis. i understand how it hurts when people are thoughtless. i used to get really hurt and cry over it. it still stings, and sometimes worse than others, but after the sting is gone the pity sets in-- that person will never know what a remarkable human i am because they can't get past the fat. and for that, i pity them. for the ignorance they have shown me, i can only imagine they have shown others who are different from them and therefore missed out on those people too. it's aweful really.
anyway, i'm sorry he was being thoughtless and mean. he probably thought nothing of it and then got defensive when he realized he was being an ass and didn't know what to say to get out of it. don't let him set you back. that gives the negative thoughts too much power over you.
:)

Sometimes when I am out picking up some tofu or other typically veggie food, I'll get "Are you a vegetarian? No wonder you're so skinny!"

It is purely genetics. My mother was an omni until she was a grown up, yet she was 5' 9" and weighed 118 lbs. Same as me.

Thank goodness I've never heard "you a vegan? I never would have guessed" when picking up my tofu. How rude. Is this from a stranger delicious?

I get that all the time. "Are you a vegetarian?" "Yes"...."Oh, I thought vegetarians were skinny." :stinkeye:

Anyway, if you feel good and are comfortable in your own skin, don't let someone's insensitive comments get you down. You are what YOU want to be, and someone being a jerk shouldn't make you question that. :hug:

It depends on if he meant saying you're "chubby" as an insult. There's nothing wrong with being chubby anyway so just because someone says it doesn't automatically mean they're a jerk, IMO. I guess I'd have to know if he's done jerk-related things before/is known to be a jerk, then it would probably be meant as an insult. He said you look fine though so I don't feel like saying that he is a jerk. It sucks that today so many people feel bad about not being thin (including myself sort of) and that society has so much power over what we think. I wish it didn't, but sadly it does. As long as people are at a healthy weight, they're fine.

Well, my way of looking at it is, most people (anyone in our society in possession of brains, really) should know that women don't appreciate being called chubby, its not something nice that we like to hear. Whether this is right, wrong, or indifferent is besides the point, in a way: everyone knows 'chubby' is generally not a nice adjective to describe a woman in today's society.

I wish I lived in the 15-1600s... I'd be such a babe, lol

How great would it be for women to actually WANT to look like me, instead of using me as a visual motivation to put down the Rice Dream & get on the stair-master, hahaha

Haha, thats awesome Katt.

http://quizzart.free.fr/baroque_fichiers/piet.jpg
http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/rembrandt/1650/bathsheba.jpg
http://www.wsu.edu:8080/~dee/GRAPHICS/GALLERY/BOTT/BOTT2.JPG

Sexy Baroque-Resaissance ladies.

Well, my way of looking at it is, most people (anyone in our society in possession of brains, really) should know that women don't appreciate being called chubby, its not something nice that we like to hear. Whether this is right, wrong, or indifferent is besides the point, in a way: everyone knows 'chubby' is generally not a nice adjective to describe a woman in today's society.
That's what I hate. People shouldn't take "chubby" as an insult, although I know most people today that says someone is chubby will probably mean it as an insult. But mostly the reason why I'm not sure that guy meant it as an insult is he said she looked fine after that..

Yeah, I know what you are saying. I'm only saying that being truly "chubby", I kind of treat it as an adjective for "fat", even though it probably isn't intended that way. And we all know in our society, it seems very important to be thin and there seems to be alot of pressure on women to be thin.

Rainbowmoon... thanks for that. Those paintings are beautiful and the women in them are beautiful.

and I have no idea what you look like 80s, but "chubby for a vegetarian" to some people is like telling someone they're "tall for a dwarf" or somesuch thing. Some people have this stereotype in their heads that vegetarians should be so thin that they'd have their own weight category. so thin that you could tell by looking at a lineup which ones are the vegetarians because they're freakishly thin. so "chubby for a vegetarian" would be approximately Kate Moss size.

A temp who was working at our office for the week told me that I was the healthiest looking vegetarian she had ever seen and said "Most vegetarians I know are all thin and pasty looking". I just told her that you can be a vegetarian and still be unhealthy. Another girl at work (who is semi-vegetarian, and her fiance is vegie) said "What you do eat is as important as what you don't eat".

There is this image that vegetarians are thin - either because they are health food freaks or because they are weak and malnourished. I just be me, and let people realise that neither image is always true.

I was vegetarian & 185 lbs @ 5'6", which according to BMI index is obese. Then I went vegan. I dropped to 156, which is where I'm @ today.
I'll never be slender, but I *have* been an exotic dancer & artists' model @ this size, & gotten nothing but rave reviews (except in one instance when a club told me to slim down- I quit instead).
I don't know why it is assumed all vegetarians/vegans must be petite.

I wish I lived in the 15-1600s... I'd be such a babe, lol

How great would it be for women to actually WANT to look like me, instead of using me as a visual motivation to put down the Rice Dream & get on the stair-master, hahaha

I believe it still would be like that, had our ways not changed. In those times, being a bit round in the middle, meant that you were healthy and could afford good food. The skinny people were more or less your pesants. Unfortunatly, the care and love or cooking meals and eating in general has been savagely beaten by fast food and cheap junk food. The heafty or even just "chubby" people are looked upon as being slothy or discusting. And the thin are seen as the money makers and attractive-energetic people. But it is societies fault really. (right, i lost track)
Im not quote fat (i hate this word, it should be "I have fat") but I am surely not ultra-skinny. I have some stuff to grab on to ;) And thats fine!! :D

I have actually gotten the whole vegetarian/vegan=waif comment before. Its bothersome in respect to peoples ignorance, but I just sluff it off.

Another thing that bugs me is guys or girls who chose their mates by weight. :notvegan:
Just take care, run jump play and eat as damn well much as you want!!
~GB

The context of the conversation makes me think that "You look fine" was back tracking since he was talking about how he can't stand when women are "whales". I don't mind being called voluptuous or something along those lines but chubby? The word makes me shudder with the days of junior high when that was my nickname.

Gee what a nice nickname.
*GB

just try to forget about it. It could have been worse.. he could have said that he thought YOU were one of the "whale-women" he can't stand. At least you say you are only 5-10lbs overweight, which to me, I don't even count that as being significant.. and you said you feel fine how you are.. which is what's most important. Some people are 100, 200, maybe even 300 or more pounds overweight and are comfortable with how they look & as long as they are healthy otherwise, that's wonderful. If they can love how they are, you should have no problem (all other issues aside) ... All this coming from me, who could never even take an ounce of her own advice.. lol... At least you are not 70+lbs overweight, like me! :p :)

Nevertheless, I can sympathize with you. Although I am totally fat and I know/admit/accept it, I am devastated for days when someone comments about my size or weight.. especially since i USED to be thin.. how I long for it...

IMHO, thin is overrated.

IMHO, thin is overrated.

:yes:

<---currently 25 lbs overweight. I'm just aiming to be healthy at the moment. If I lose weight, fine, but if I don't and I'm still healthy, it's all good. :)

I don't really know how much over I am because I don't think that there is a good measuring device out there for where I should/shouldn't be weight wise. I figure if I'm confident and have a healthy self esteem, my cholesterol, blood pressure, yadda yadda yadda is good then I'm alright. If my doctor ever told me my weight was affecting my health I would more than likely try to loose some.