would you prefer to date a veggie, vegan than a meateater?

[blondegurl38]

i'm not sure what i think, people always ask me if i would go out with a meateater, i always say yes but only if they respect my belief- and i will their's. but i'm not sure because i wouldn't possibly beable to kiss a meateater unless they wash their teeth!! I just can't even think of it. Most of my friends are meateaters and they are all very friendly, so i have nothing against them.

[penny79]

Whoever I meet that is respectful to me and I am attractive to.

[blondegurl38]

yeah, i agree with that. and i wouldn't say no straight away because of what they eat. but preferably i want to go out with a veggie, vegan.

[LiveVegan]

I'm divorced. Let me tell ya, don't marry someone on the assumption that you guys will respect the others food choices. I can't speak for everyone but I can say that it isn't worth the risk. Food plays a big part in everyone's day even though its really such a simple act.

If you truly don't care about buying 2 sets of groceries and cooking seperately and you have no moral reasons for your veg*anism then by all means go for it. But if you're veg*an for moral reason...don't chance it.

In my case, I married my hubby with the understanding that he cook his food I cook mine. Sure it happens through the newlywed time but then it gets old real fast.

Not to say you can't pull it off, I'm just saying its a risk you should be aware of.

[Will Penguin]

All other things being equal, I'd of course prefer to be with someone who is vegetaian or vegan, but really, it would be pretty limiting to ONLY date such people. If someone didn't respect my food choices, of course that's a deal breaker, but otherwise, I say to each his/her own.

My GF (actually fiance now) was omni when we met (she ate a little chicken and seafood sometimes) but has since gone veggie. It works fine- she is very respectful of my veganism (In fact she says she really admires my decision) and is even considering it herself, and for my part I don't EVER pressure her or make and unwelcome comments about what she eats. (I even sometimes make her eggs in the morning while she's getting ready, to save her time)

[amhappy1]

I'm vegan, so it would be nice to date someone who doesn't want to eat at steakhouses and won't make a face when I ask what is in a recipe.

I don't have anything against omnis, I just don't want that stuff in my house.

[Zealousy]

It'd be nice to have a veg*n lover. ;D But I'm not one to judge someone solely on their dietary habits.

[Miso Jace]

i'd much prefer to be with a veg*an, but beggars can't be choosers, so i make concessions for those who are otherwise a good fit who are respectful. i wouldn't move in with or marry an omni though for practical reasons.

[Kellye]

What someone eats doesn't really matter to me and I would hope my significant other would feel the same way about it. In fact, they probably wouldn't be my significant other if they didn't feel that way about it.

[SomebodyElse]

I don't understand why people equate veganism with mere dietary choices. I don't care about what people eat either. I care about how they view others, especially those who are weaker than they are and cannot fight back. So I would have no more in common with someone who thinks it's okay to kill animals and eat them than I would with someone who thinks it's okay to beat up children. It's about mindset, not diet.

Fortunately, I don't require the respect of omnivores, so I don't feel a need to respect them.

[madchild]

Personally, I view veganism as much more than just a food choice. It's a belief system and a lifestyle I would find it very difficult to have a long term relationship with an omnivore.

That being, said, I spent the first 20 odd years of my life as an omnivore, so I try not to be judgmental and therefore give everyone a chance. I've dated some omnis who were very respectful of my lifestyle, and others who weren't.

I've even dated some omnis who converted (without me pressuring them) once they got a a better understanding of veganism. So, I always think it's worth a shot, but very difficult in the long term.

[Puppet Master]

Yes. It would have to be a requirement.

[ket]

I don't understand why people equate veganism with mere dietary choices. I don't care about what people eat either. I care about how they view others, especially those who are weaker than they are and cannot fight back. So I would have no more in common with someone who thinks it's okay to kill animals and eat them than I would with someone who thinks it's okay to beat up children. It's about mindset, not diet.

Fortunately, I don't require the respect of omnivores, so I don't feel a need to respect them.

I get that, but it isn't as if one can live life without omnivores in it on a daily basis. One can disagree with another on which ethical system is best, but we still have to live together, you know what I mean? So while parents at school might believe in spanking or whipping their kids, I still have to deal with them in some capacity if I were another parent with kids. They do not think what they are doing is wrong. Unless you can isolate yourself from everyone who does not share your ethical framework, you need to be able to live together somehow.

I think I am rethinking what I think about other people's opinions, or at least whether or not people can recognize the wrongness in what they are doing.

I try to put myself in their shoes -- if someone told me I was wrong for not believing in God, I would be annoyed and think they were idiots. If they based their entire ethical system on a dogma that I simply don't share with them, then I'm not going to think what I am doing is wrong, I am just going to think that that person has stringent beliefs.

I don't know where the line is. Yes, I believe it is wrong to kill animals, but I can't think that the majority of my friends and family are evil (I don't know many vegetarians and even fewer vegans). Moreover, I can't think that everyone can move towards an ethical system that is against the norm in many ways. Also, so many people, from what I am realizing, really believe that meat is essential to their livelihood and health (and perhaps pleasure, family ties and tradition).

I just don't know what to think. If you despise everyone who eats meat, you end up hating a lot of people and constantly judging everyone. I just don't have the energy or personality to feel so antagonistic towards people. I also deeply love my omni friends, and for some reason, I don't think the issue of eating meat is as cut and dry an ethical issue, but perhaps that's because it is just so normal. Maybe this is my own coping mechanism...I don't know.

In any case, I have been with my partner 6 years before I became a vegetarian, so how could I expect him to have the same ideas as I do? Also, he is wonderful about my vegetarianism and supports me fully! If I hadn't had someone, I actually doubt I would meet a vegetarian in real life because I don't go to vegetarian activist groups -- those aren't necessarily the type of people I am typically attracted to, so I don't know if I would go there to meet someone.

It is difficult to meet people and it is difficult to know where they stand on all sorts of issues. If I were internet dating and could easily see people's beliefs written out, it might be easier to find vegetarians.

It would also be a shame to have someone to convert!

I know one fella who was vegetarian for 6 years, and then quit -- what if your partner quit?! Would that end everything that you had built together?

Vegetarianism is part of my ethical system and part of me, but does not inform all of my interests and desires. Many of those are of equal or greater weight in finding a partner.

[dormouse]

For me, vegetarianism isn't the biggest part of my philosophy and lifestyle (Dormouse-ism, if you will). I'm willing to let that slide for the sake of other things that are more important to me in an SO. I've been dating my omni boyfriend for a year now, and we work things out very well. Even though we are both huge foodies, the difference in our eating habits has never been a problem. He's also really into designer fashion, much of which involves leather, and I don't really mind.

However, I could never date someone that believes in God, or is very traditional or conservative. I could never date someone who likes bad music and movies. I could never date someone who isn't somewhat intellectual. It all depends on how you prioritize your values. Despite how often I post on VB, vegetarianism just isn't high up there on the list.

[Toast]

I don't understand why people equate veganism with mere dietary choices.

:yes: I can understand how someone would equate vegetarianism with diet but not veganism. Veganism is not just about diet no matter how many people seem to think it is!


Personally, I view veganism as much more than just a food choice.

Again, I agree.

I am married to an omnivore. I wouldn't want to chuck him out and replace him with a vegan (;)) but I would hope one day that he will become a vegan himself. He seems to agree with most of my ethics and he doesn't like animal cruelty but he blocks it out of his mind when it comes to eating bacon or steak. He doesn't have the motivation to change as being omni is much easier and he also doesn't like fruit and vegetables. *Sigh*

[Toast]

Dormouse - I agree with you about the religion thing. I don't think I could ever be with someone who believed in God or that had conservative values either.

[SomebodyElse]

I get that, but it isn't as if one can live life without omnivores in it on a daily basis. One can disagree with another on which ethical system is best, but we still have to live together, you know what I mean?
Yes. Fortunately, we don't have to date them all though. :p

[Sevenseas]

[long post]Association with co-workers, parents, sisters, brothers and even friends is not really based on sharing a worldview. For some, being with a SO partly is.

[Earthling]

I'm open to dating meat-eaters and vegetarians, but I don't think I could 'marry' a girl unless she was vegan. Or at least be willing to eat and use only vegan products in our house.

[mingster]

It would be love to date someone veg*n, but not a requirement as long as they are openminded to my lifestyle as well.

Although I find it hard to be attracted to someone who ate meat, as the thought just puts me completely.

[karenlovessnow]

I've been married to an omni for 35 years, so I'm not allowed to date. But I would vote yes, I'd prefer a vegetarian/vegan. :D

[Melanie]

I'm very lucky to be with a vegan guy. In a sense, I became veg because of him (although I was always going to end up veg, he kind of sped things up). I'm not sure if I would be willing to end up with a omni anymore, because the scenario has not come up since being veg, and it probably never will, since my guy and I plan on marrying.

[paisleyjane]

I'm divorced. Let me tell ya, don't marry someone on the assumption that you guys will respect the others food choices. I can't speak for everyone but I can say that it isn't worth the risk. Food plays a big part in everyone's day even though its really such a simple act.

If you truly don't care about buying 2 sets of groceries and cooking seperately and you have no moral reasons for your veg*anism then by all means go for it. But if you're veg*an for moral reason...don't chance it.

In my case, I married my hubby with the understanding that he cook his food I cook mine. Sure it happens through the newlywed time but then it gets old real fast.

Not to say you can't pull it off, I'm just saying its a risk you should be aware of.

I could have written this post myself, nearly word for word. I don't think people realize what a big issue differing diets and lifestyles really can be.

Unfortunately love is simply not enough. If you aren't shopping/cooking/eating together, that is a really huge chunk of bonding/quality time that has gone out the window. Plus, if your spouse is directly contributing to something you specifically are against (basically, acting in complete opposition of your ethics) it is really hard to find them attractive.


I don't understand why people equate veganism with mere dietary choices. I don't care about what people eat either. I care about how they view others, especially those who are weaker than they are and cannot fight back. So I would have no more in common with someone who thinks it's okay to kill animals and eat them than I would with someone who thinks it's okay to beat up children. It's about mindset, not diet.

I agree.

[LetoTheTyrant]

I was dating a vegan when I went veg/vegan, so I was always of the opinion that I couldn't handle dating an omni.

Contrary to this I recently started dating an omni. Fortunately for me though, she rarely eats meat, and is ridiculous about oral hygiene. I don't even think if I tried I could make out with her without her mouth being clean. I swear she mouthwashes every fifteen minutes.

I really did think I had a problem, and didn't think I would start dating this girl, but she definitely has all sorts or respect for my views. She works at whole foods (shudders) and visited a vendor fair soon after we started dating. Her friends were making fun of her for asking everyone if their products were vegan :smitten:

[Kiran]

I've been married for 17 years and she's now a veggie (hooray!). That said, if I was on the market again, I'd definitely prefer to date veggies exclusively. There is just something incredibly sexy about a compassionate woman who eats a plant based diet! :)